從北歐雪國(guó)到山城霧都

文/本刊記者 李靜

從北歐雪國(guó)到山城霧都

文/本刊記者 李靜

Anders幸福的一家

在搬到重慶居住前，來(lái)自瑞典的Anders已經(jīng)來(lái)來(lái)往往中國(guó)不下8次，不僅是因?yàn)楣ぷ鞯脑颍€因?yàn)樵谶@期間，他遇到了自己生命中的另一半，他的重慶太太王梅。兩人和他們的漂亮女兒一起，在瑞典待了10年。但對(duì)Anders來(lái)說(shuō)，他對(duì)在中國(guó)生活一直很向往，他很喜歡中國(guó)，來(lái)到中國(guó)就像是生命的另一次冒險(xiǎn)旅行，充滿(mǎn)未知、新奇與向往。于是，在2009年11月，Anders終于如愿以?xún)敚吞黄穑瑥倪b遠(yuǎn)的北歐雪國(guó)搬到了霧都山城。

太太來(lái)自重慶萬(wàn)盛，Anders自然跟隨太太來(lái)到萬(wàn)盛開(kāi)始了自己的重慶生活。因?yàn)椴煌牡乩砦恢煤铜h(huán)境，萬(wàn)盛和重慶主城區(qū)自然有著很大的區(qū)別，一個(gè)寧?kù)o諧和，就像自己的家鄉(xiāng)；一個(gè)熱鬧繁華。雖然不同，但Anders非常喜歡這樣的反差，讓他有不一樣的感覺(jué)。

Anders在瑞典是一個(gè)心理分析師，從04年開(kāi)始，他便開(kāi)始幫助人們分析、疏導(dǎo)心理問(wèn)題，為他們解決心理上的困惑，釋放壓力。他面對(duì)的病人都有不同的問(wèn)題，焦慮、壓力等，和所有心理分析師一樣，Anders有著優(yōu)秀的職業(yè)素養(yǎng)，他沉著冷靜，耐心地傾聽(tīng)客人的生活經(jīng)歷和想法，為他們提供可取的建議。“這是一份不容易的工作，因?yàn)槊總€(gè)人都有不同的想法，而每個(gè)人在面對(duì)陌生人時(shí)，即使面對(duì)的是心理醫(yī)生，他們也會(huì)隱藏自己內(nèi)心的一些真實(shí)想法，而我要做的，就是讓他們信任我，走進(jìn)他們的內(nèi)心世界里去。這是一個(gè)信任的問(wèn)題，只有和病人保持良好的關(guān)系才能完成。”Anders語(yǔ)調(diào)緩慢地說(shuō)道，“我工作的目標(biāo)就是幫助病人們找回自己的那份潛力和信心”。

作為一個(gè)與人的內(nèi)心打交道的人來(lái)說(shuō)，長(zhǎng)期傾聽(tīng) 病人的心理困擾，有時(shí)也會(huì)讓自己陷入迷茫，受 病人的想法干擾，每到這個(gè)時(shí)候，除了有心理督導(dǎo)幫助他們，Anders還會(huì)收起行裝，去走耶穌走過(guò)的路，在瑞典，人們稱(chēng)之為朝圣。他會(huì)坐飛機(jī)到法國(guó)，然后步行到西班牙、意大利、耶路撒冷等國(guó)家，一年一次，每次都去不同的地方。“在行走的過(guò)程中，我們讓自己的心靈得到平靜，清空。這樣才好回去更好地工作。”Anders非常喜歡自己的職業(yè)。而每到這個(gè)時(shí)候，太太都會(huì)非常支持他。

現(xiàn)在，Anders正在一家重慶本地的心理診所工作。雖然來(lái)重慶工作的時(shí)間不長(zhǎng)，但Anders已經(jīng)有了很多向他尋求幫助的病人，大多是12歲——21歲的青少年。在瑞典的時(shí)候，Anders已經(jīng)有了幫助青少年的經(jīng)驗(yàn)，他認(rèn)為，在中國(guó)的孩子們其實(shí)壓力很大，學(xué)習(xí)負(fù)擔(dān)重，又正好是叛逆的年齡，所以難免會(huì)有困惑。因?yàn)樽约阂灿泻⒆樱Ｍo孩子們更多的幫助和關(guān)懷，“讓他們重新認(rèn)識(shí)和了解自己和他們的生活，這樣才能真正幫到他們”。

因?yàn)檎Z(yǔ)言交流障礙，在重慶的 病人只能通過(guò)發(fā)信息或電子郵件來(lái)與他交流，也有個(gè)別會(huì)用簡(jiǎn)單的英語(yǔ)和身體語(yǔ)言與他溝通。但Anders非常開(kāi)心，這是他第一次幫助到自己國(guó)家以外的人。“以這樣發(fā)信息的方式為他們做心理咨詢(xún)很好，就像是一個(gè)朋友，更能讓他們相信我。”提到在重慶的工作，Anders非常滿(mǎn)意。太太王梅也很開(kāi)心Anders能夠這么快地適應(yīng)重慶的生活，做自己喜歡的工作。Anders一直有個(gè)愿望，就是希望在重慶開(kāi)一家自己的心理咨詢(xún)室，為在重慶生活的外籍人士和本地人提供心理服務(wù)指導(dǎo)。

平日不工作的時(shí)候，Anders便會(huì)和家人一起，逛逛重慶的大街小巷，去不同的城區(qū)看看，每到一處，他都覺(jué)得很驚喜，因?yàn)檫@座城市和他的家鄉(xiāng)完全不同，到處都讓他充滿(mǎn)新鮮感。短短一年多的時(shí)間，Anders已經(jīng)愛(ài)上了重慶，北歐的寒冷與火爐一樣的重慶是兩個(gè)極端，也讓這個(gè)來(lái)自冰雪之國(guó)的瑞典人體驗(yàn)了自己第二故鄉(xiāng)的獨(dú)特魅力。

看著蹦蹦跳跳、活潑可愛(ài)的女兒，Anders覺(jué)得很幸福，作為一個(gè)重慶女婿，他希望可以和妻子、孩子一起，在這里生活上10年，每天親眼目睹這座城市的發(fā)展變化，做一個(gè)優(yōu)秀的心理分析師，讓重慶的朋友每天都開(kāi)開(kāi)心心。

Be fo re m oving to Chongq ing, Ande rs from Sweden has a lready trave lled to China m o re than eigh t tim es, it is no t on ly because o f his job, bu t a lso a t the sam e tim e, he m e t the o the r ha lf o f his life, his Chongqing w ife W ang Mei. They had lived w ith their beau tifu l daugh te r in Sweden fo r ten yea rs, bu t living in Ch ina has a lways been a d ream to Ande rs. Like he said, he likes China; Com ing to China is like ano the r adven tu re trave l o f his life, unknown, nove l and desirab le. On Novem be r 2009, Ande rs fina lly m oved from the snow coun try o f No rth Eu rope to this m oun tain city.

Since h is w ife is from Wan Sheng d istrict, Ande rs cam e he re to sta rt h is life in Chongq ing. Because o f the geog raphic loca tions and circum stances, W an Sheng is d iffe ren t than Chongqing u rban a rea; one is peace fu l, just like his hom e while the o the r is live ly. Bu t he likes the con trast, it gives him d iffe ren t fee lings.

Ande rs is a psycho the rap ist in Sweden. He b e g a n to h e lp p e o p le a n d g ive th em p sy c ho log ica l p e rsua s ion to so lve the ir psycho logica l p rob lem s and re lease p ressu re since 2004.His pa tien ts have d iffe ren t p rob lem s, a n x ie ty, s tre ss, p re ssu re. Like a ll the psycho the rap ists w ith exce llen t p ro fessiona l qua lity. Ande rs was ca lm and listens to their life expe riences pa tien tly and ideas then p rovide them good advice. “This is a difficu lt job because eve ryone has d iffe ren t though ts, and eve ryone w ill hide their true fee lings when facing the strange rs even a psycho the rap ist. W ha t I do is to le t them pu t trust in m e so I can wa lk in to their inside wo rld. This is a ll abou t trust, it can on ly be com p le ted un less m ain tain good re la tionship w ith pa tien ts. My job is to he lp the pa tien ts ge t their po ten tia l and con fidence back.” As a m an who a lways listens to pa tien ts' psycho logica l p rob lem s, som e tim es it's easy to be in te rfe red by them and ge t you rse lf lost. Eve ry tim e in this m om en t, besides his supe rviso r he lp them, Ande rs a lways packed up and take a trip to fo llow the Jesus' pa th, peop le ca ll it p ilg rim age. He w ill go to d iffe ren t coun tries eve ry yea r, Spain, Ita ly, and Je rusa lem. “W hen we a re wa lking, ou r hea rt ge ts ca lm and c lea r, so we can ge t back to wo rk be tte r.” Ande rs rea lly likes his job and h is w ife is rea lly suppo rtive a t th is m om en t.

Cu rren tly An d e rs w o rks fo r a lo ca l psycho log ica l c linic in Chongq ing. Although he cam e to Chongqing no t long, he has m any pa tien ts ask h im fo r he lp, m ost o f which we re12-21 yea rs o ld you ths. Ande rs a lready had expe rience he lp ing teens in Sweden. He th inks Chinese ch ild ren a re ve ry stressfu l because o f their heavy study load. And a lso a t rebe llious age, so they a re a ll puzz led and con fused. Since he has a child, he'd like to give ch ild ren m o re he lp and ca re. “He lp them ge t to know and unde rstand them se lves and the ir lives, tha t's wha t a rea lly he lp m eans.”

Righ t now pa tien ts can on ly comm unica te w ith him by send ing m essages o r e-m ail because o f the language ba rrie r, bu t som e o f them can still comm unica te w ith him in sim p le Eng lish and body language. Ande rs is ve ry happy, this is his first tim e to he lp pa tien t from d iffe ren t coun try. By doing psycho logica l counse ling in this way they trust m e as a friend, which can he lp them a lo t.”W hen m en tioned abou t his job in Chongqing, Ande rs is rea lly sa tisfied. His w ife W ang Mei is ve ry happy tha t he can adap t life he re so fast. Ande rs has a d ream tha t he can open up his own psycho log ica l counse ling c linic in Chongqing fo r a ll the expa ts and loca l peop le to p rovide psycho logica l se rvices instruction.

Ande rs likes to stay w ith his fam ily in his spa re tim e, they w a lked eve ry stree t and d iffe ren t towns o f Chongqing, and he fe lt ve ry su rp rised to see th is spec ia l city tha t is com p le te ly d iffe ren t from his hom e tow n. W ithin a yea r, Ande rs has fa llen in love w ith Chongqing, the extrem es o f co ld as No rth Eu rope and ho t as fu rnace, the Sw ed ish guy expe rienced the un ique cha rm o f his second hom e town.

Looking a t his love ly daugh te r, Ande rs fe lt ve ry happy. As a Chongqing son-in-law, he hoped to live in Chongqing w ith his w ife and kid fo r ano the r ten yea rs to w itness the city's d e ve lo pm e n t, h e w a n ts to b e a g o o d psycho the rap ist and w ish a ll the Chongqing friends happy eve ry day.

From Snow Count ry to Mountain City

W ritten by Aggie & Gary Hynson