你是會議精神紊亂癥患者嗎？

Tammy： Another one？ Yikes！

Shane： It’s another one of those stupid meetings again， isn’t it？

Tammy： Can you believe it？ ①It’s becoming an everyday occurrence. Don’t they realize what a waste of time it is？

Shane： Obviously not， or they wouldn’t keep scheduling them.

Tammy： And why do they always have to be right as we’re heading out the door？

Shane： Well， that’s easy. They do it because it’s a way to make us stay late without having to pay us overtime.

Tammy： Oh my God， you’re right！ That’s so sneaky！ How can they get away with it？

Shane： Oh， the usual employment loopholes and other ways around labor laws. It’s actually common practice.

Tammy： Well， I’m fed up. This is just one in a line of thousands of meetings we’ve had over the years， about something that could just as easily be explained through an email chain. I mean， it makes no sense. Why waste company resources and employees’ time and energy with pointless daily meetings？ ②It’s probably why we’ve been in the red for years now.

Shane： No， we’ve been losing money due to a lack of innovation. Basically， we’re behind the times.

Tammy： Alright. But while it may not be the cause of our company’s downfall， it’s certainly not helping matters. And I think all the excessive meetings have caused me to contract a mild case of Meeting 1）Affective Disorder.

Shane： That just sounds like an excuse to get out of a meeting.

Tammy： Well， you’re wrong. It’s a real condition， and it affects millions of people across the globe.

Shane： So， tell me about it.

Tammy： OK. Well， it starts with a general malaise， feeling a bit drowsy and pretty much out of it. Then， as it progresses， I start to imagine myself in the third person， sort of an out-ofbody experience.

S h a n e ： S o u n d s l i k e daydreaming to me.

Tammy： That’s cuz you love to oversimplify everything. The fact is that， much like Seasonal Affective Disorder， which many people originally 2）scoffed at as nonsense， this Meeting Affective Disorder is indeed an actual 3）ailment. You see， an affective disorder can have a serious effect on someone’s mood. ③So much so， that it’s even been known to lead to serious bouts of depression and even occasional suicide.

Shane： So you’re saying that boring meetings can lead people to kill themselves？

Tammy： What I’m saying is that anything from the weather to a meeting can have a huge impact on people’s state of mind.

And these meetings make it hard for me to stay positive， because all I feel when I’m at the meetings is depressed.

Shane： Oh. I had no idea it was that bad. In that case， why not head on home and I’ll cover for you， alright？ I’ll tell ’em you had some…personal business to take care of.

Tammy： Thanks Shane， I appreciate it. I’ll see you tomorrow.

Shane： See ya. And get some rest， will ya？

Tammy： Well， I was gonna take a nice nap in the meeting， but I guess I’ll just curl up for one at home instead.

Shane： That’s the whole idea！

塔米：哎呀！又來了？

謝恩：這又是另一個無聊透頂的會議，不是嗎？

塔米：真是難以置信。這樣的會議要變成家常便飯了。難道他們沒有意識到這是在浪費時間嗎？

謝恩：顯然沒有，否則他們不會一直安排這些會議的。

塔米：而且那些會議為什么總是剛好安排在我們下班的時間點？

謝恩：這個嘛，原因很簡單。因為他們可以通過這種方式來讓我們在公司待更長時間，卻不用給我們支付加班費。

塔米：噢，天啊，你說得太對了！這樣做實在是太狡猾了！他們怎么沒有受到處罰？

謝恩：噢，（他們利用的就）是常見的雇傭漏洞以及其他打勞動法規擦邊球的方式。實際上這種現象很常見。

塔米：唉，我真是受夠了。這些年來我們參加過的會議數不勝數，而這只是冰山一角。這次的會議內容簡單到完全可以通過郵件就可以闡述清楚的。我想說的是，參加這樣的會議是毫無意義的。為什么要把公司的資源以及員工們的時間與精力浪費在這些毫無意義的例會上呢？也許這就是我們公司這些年來財政赤字的罪魁禍首吧。

謝恩：不，我們公司虧損是因為缺乏創新力量。基本上，我們與時代脫軌了。

塔米：好吧。不過就算它沒有導致我們公司衰落，也肯定沒有推動公司的發展。而且我覺得，由于這些過于頻繁的會議，我已經變成輕度的會議精神紊亂癥患者。

謝恩：聽上去那像是你不想參加會議的一個借口而已。

塔米：吶，你錯了。這是真的，此外全球有數百萬人都受到會議精神紊亂癥的困擾。

謝恩：好吧，那你說說看。

塔米：好。首先，你會感覺身體不適，有點昏昏欲睡的感覺，差不多是這樣。漸漸地，我開始幻想著把自己置身于會議之外，有點像靈魂出竅的那樣。

謝恩：對我來說這像是白日夢。

塔米：那是因為你喜歡過于簡化所有的事情。事實上，我的癥狀有點像季節性情感紊亂癥。一開始，人們對它嗤之以鼻，認為它是無稽之談，但實際上會議精神紊亂癥確實是一種疾病。你也明白，情緒紊亂會嚴重影響人的心情。它還會引發嚴重的消極情緒，甚至會間歇性產生自殺的念頭。

謝恩：所以你的意思是說那些無聊透頂的會議能導致人們自殺？

塔米：我想說的是任何東西，從天氣到會議，都能對人們的心情帶來巨大的影響。這些會議讓我很難保持樂觀的心情，因為當我置身于會議中所能感受到的一切就只有絕望。

謝恩：噢，我不知道它會糟糕到那種地步。如果是那樣的話，你不如直接回家，我代替你去，怎么樣？我會告訴他們你有些私事要去處理一下……塔米：謝謝你謝恩。非常感激，明天見。

謝恩：再見。休息一下，知道嗎？

塔米：好吧，我本打算在會議中打個舒服的盹兒，但我想我還是會選擇窩在家里睡覺吧。

謝恩：這正是我想要說的！

Smart Sentences

① It’s becoming an everyday occurrence. 這樣的會議要變成家常便飯了。

everyday occurrence： sth. happens all the time（常事，家常便飯）。例如：

Not until customers’ complaints became an everyday occurrence did the management realize that the problem was so bad.

直到顧客投訴變成家常便飯時，管理層才意識到問題是如此嚴重。

② It’s probably why we’ve been in the red for years now.也許這就是我們公司這些年來財政赤字的罪魁禍首吧。

in the red： when a person or a business spends more money than they have（赤字，虧欠）。例如：

Because of a series of typhoons， the flower shop was 5，000 dollars in the red.

受一連串臺風的影響，花店虧了五千美元。

③ So much so， that it’s even been known to lead to serious bouts of depression and even occasional suicide. 它還會引發嚴重的消極情緒，甚至會間歇性產生自殺的念頭。

so much so： used to indicate you believe sth. to such a great extent that the following statement comes as a result（你對某事非常相信或肯定，以致有以下的結果）。例如：

The hallway was clustered with used boxes and old computer monitors. So much so that people had to walk sideways.

走廊堆滿了舊盒子和舊電腦顯示器，人要側身才能走過。