僑鄉(xiāng)留守兒童的快樂之家

戚祥浩

“媽媽，我好想你。記不清多少個夜晚，因為對你的想念，我淚流滿面。看到電視里別人的父母都在家里，享受家的溫暖，我好羨慕。可我知道，你們在國外也非常辛苦……有件事一定要告訴你，七都辦了個‘留守兒童快樂之家，那里真的很好，有多媒體教室。周末，有很多大學生來給我們上課，教我們唱歌、手工、做游戲等。我們上課都是免費的，我覺得他們像家人一樣，我在這里很快樂。等你來的時候一定要去看看……”

這是溫州市鹿城區(qū)七都街道留守兒童黃伊凡寫給遠在海外母親的一封信。

僑鄉(xiāng)七都，許多遠赴異國他鄉(xiāng)打拼的父母，只能把年幼的孩子們留在長輩身邊，他們往往連續(xù)多年見不到彼此。

邋遢、孤僻，留守兒童身上慣有的烙印，在這些孩子身上卻全然不見。走進七都留守兒童之家，孩子們個個臉上都洋溢著天真爛漫的笑容。只因為，他們有一個共同的周奶奶。

周奶奶名叫周祥薇，抱著兒孫盡享天倫之樂，是周祥薇這個年紀很多溫州老人的第一選擇。66歲的周祥薇卻“花錢買辛苦”，把所有能擠出的時間都給了七都島上的留守兒童。創(chuàng)辦“快樂之家”，為孩子們找回屬于他們的快樂，周祥薇已經(jīng)堅持了十年。

今年1月，在“最美浙江人——2016年度浙江驕傲人物評選”活動頒獎典禮上，周祥薇成為溫州地區(qū)唯一入選者。她此前還榮獲“中國僑界杰出人物”等榮譽稱號。但在周祥薇看來，沒有什么比“為孩子們彌補缺失的親情，找尋到成長的快樂”更加重要。

為留守孩子尋找快樂

早在改革開放初期，周祥薇便開始闖蕩市場。隨著生意規(guī)模的擴大，周祥薇經(jīng)常要遠赴歐美國家。與在異國打拼的親朋好友相聚時，大家最憂心的莫過于留在家中的孩子。

“家家是僑戶，人人是僑民”的七都島有200多名留守兒童，“隔代教育”率達100%。每逢周末或寒暑假，這些孩子往往只能與電視相伴。因為缺乏父母陪伴關愛，一些孩子的性格變得十分孤僻。

“老人家?guī)Ш⒆樱瑢O輩重養(yǎng)輕教，對他們的成長非常不利。”于是，周祥薇漸漸地萌生了一個想法，要給孩子們在小島上建一個快樂溫馨的“家”。聽說周祥薇要完全免費做這件事時，大家難以相信自己的耳朵，各種質(zhì)疑聲紛至沓來。

周祥薇用對孩子的各種關愛舉動來回應質(zhì)疑。她與鎮(zhèn)里聯(lián)系，將原來老村活動室騰出來做“快樂之家”，她和女婿帶頭出資40萬元，并發(fā)動其他華僑僑眷紛紛解囊，募得資金135萬元。終于，一幢450多平方米、帶室外活動場地的三層小樓落成了，七都留守兒童有了“快樂之家”。

“我?guī)Ш⒆觽儫荆囵B(yǎng)他們動手的能力；陪孩子們游葡萄園、賞荷花，告訴他們要珍惜農(nóng)民的勞動成果；開設模擬法庭，讓孩子們從小學習法律知識，懂得怎樣做人；帶孩子們觀摹甌塑、甌繡，希望他們多了解家鄉(xiāng)優(yōu)秀的傳統(tǒng)文化，不要忘記自己是溫州人。”周祥薇忙得像陀螺一樣，整個身心圍著孩子們不停地轉(zhuǎn)動。

為了讓孩子們真正感到快樂。周祥薇不斷與溫州大學協(xié)調(diào)，使“快樂之家”成為該院實踐基地。大學生來這里教孩子們學習國學、美術、作文、英語等，每到周末或暑假，這里總是島上最熱鬧的地方，朗朗書聲、悠悠樂音在小島上蕩漾開來。

讓兒女與父母重建親情溝通

孩子們課余生活豐富了，知識長進了，但周祥薇發(fā)現(xiàn)了新的問題。她與這些孩子們交流中發(fā)現(xiàn)，他們的心理困擾還沒有解除。在七都，許多留守兒童一出生就離開父母，對父母艱辛創(chuàng)業(yè)并不理解，還經(jīng)常責怪父母不關心自己的成長。為了讓孩子們了解父母的苦心，每個周六“快樂之家”開課的時候，周祥薇都會抽出時間給孩子們講自己創(chuàng)業(yè)的艱辛經(jīng)歷，理解父母在異國打拼的艱難，使孩子們懂得珍惜眼下的學習和生活；利用各個節(jié)日教育孩子們給父母寫一段話，主動給父母打電話問候。

“媽媽，我從視頻里看到，你額頭上刻上了一道深深的皺紋。原來濃密的黑發(fā)上，不知何時也爬上了幾縷銀絲。那是為我家日夜操勞的象征。媽媽，您辛苦了。”

“爸爸，其實我一直都知道，您對我的愛是無私的，就像一片大海，里面埋藏著許多珍貴的寶藏，可表面上卻表現(xiàn)得那么平靜。爸爸，我還要提醒你一點，不要再吸煙了。老師說過，吸煙有害身體健康。還有少喝酒，喝酒傷身體呢。”

……

“印象最深的是，我讓孩子們在母親節(jié)的時候，給自己的媽媽寫一封信。后來我選了幾封信現(xiàn)場念了一下，念著念著我就哭了，孩子們也哭了。那種對遠在異國他鄉(xiāng)的母親的思念之情，流淌在孩子們稚嫩的筆尖。”周祥薇說，這些宣泄情感的舉動，無形中也拉近了留守兒童和父母的距離。

周祥薇還主動向心理專家和老師請教有關兒童心理學的知識，和溫大的心理學系合作，給孩子們上集體心理輔導課，并因人而異進行心理輔導。

暑假快樂營中，周祥薇白天與孩子們一起上課，放學后則帶著大學生到孩子家里家訪，為每個孩子建立檔案，了解困擾他們的難題，在孩子與父母之間重建一座愛的橋梁。

許多孩子的人生從此轉(zhuǎn)變

留守兒童徐梓偉不到兩歲就被父母從意大利送回七都，由爺爺奶奶撫養(yǎng)。常年缺失親情的小梓偉性格孤僻。爺爺奶奶目不識丁，無法輔導他的學習，成績糟糕又調(diào)皮的小梓偉成了同學們眼中的“壞孩子”。奶奶記得，孫子近兩年時間沒有過笑容。當奶奶得知村里其他人都把孫輩送往留守兒童“快樂之家”時，也把徐梓偉送了過去。

很快，在一群活蹦亂跳的孩子中，周祥薇注意到了沉默寡言的徐梓偉。

“我把他抱過來，坐到自己身上。我問他，你為什么不開心啊，他就哭，捧著臉大哭一陣。然后我說徐梓偉別哭，周奶奶很喜歡你。這里有很多的同學、老師都很愛你。你有什么事情同周奶奶說，周奶奶會幫你，有很多老師一起幫你。”

周奶奶真心的擁抱讓這個不會笑的孩子感受到了親人般的溫暖。那一刻也永遠定格在了小梓偉的內(nèi)心深處。她還把徐梓偉接到了自己家里，吃住一起。

三個星期后，大家看到了徐梓偉最明顯的變化：他臉上的笑容漸漸多了起來。快樂之家，真正成為了小梓偉找尋快樂的地方：每到周六，小梓偉都會很早起床，盼望去“快樂之家”學習繪畫、剪紙、書法......最重要的是每一次他都能得到慈祥的周奶奶一個大大的擁抱。小梓偉變得越來越開朗。

“快樂之家”給孩子帶來的變化遠不止此。連日來，七都居民胡長滔沉浸在興奮中。他把“孫子胡鉑燁捧回繪畫比賽第一名”的消息，對分布在多個國家的親友挨個說了個遍，成為大家的一件樂事。

胡長滔稱，“快樂之家”像變戲法一樣，讓進去的孫子變了樣。孩子學習后展露的天賦，讓胡長滔有了讓孩子試著往美術方面發(fā)展的念頭。

這樣的例子，在七都島舉不勝舉。

針對問題孩子，周祥薇組織家訪，和國外的父母取得聯(lián)系，幫助孩子解決心理難題；她自掏腰包舉辦兒童書畫展、演講比賽、文藝演出，帶孩子們參觀博物館、科技館、游歷溫州的風景名勝；開學了，她給孩子們送書包和文具；兒童節(jié)到了，給大家籌辦文藝演出、游園等豐富的活動；端午、中秋、春節(jié)來臨，給孩子們送去小粽子、小月餅、小年貨……

周祥薇的一舉一動贏得了七都人的尊重。走在七都島的路上，不僅隨處可以聽到孩子親切地喊她“周奶奶”，而且上了年紀的老人同樣喊她“周奶奶”。

十年間，孩子們換了一批又一批，一些孩子出國回到了父母身邊，又有新的一些孩子加入。但從來不變的是周祥薇全心全意的愛心付出。哪怕，一次次顧不上家庭遭致丈夫埋怨；哪怕，親孫子剛在美國出生需要陪伴；哪怕，企業(yè)太多事情讓她無法分心……每個周末和暑假，她總能出現(xiàn)在孩子們面前，臉上掛著招牌式的慈祥微笑。

“現(xiàn)在每逢過年，很多華僑都會給我打電話表示感謝，說自己的小孩變好了，這是我最高興的時候。”周祥薇希望從這里走出去的孩子，將來都能成為有用的人，回報父母、回報家鄉(xiāng)、回報國家。

把“快樂”一直接力下去

為了更好地照顧孩子，周祥薇專門聘了一個管理員。她那里有一份七都島留守兒童的名單。每個周末，管理員都會提醒孩子的爺爺奶奶，別忘記送孩子來“快樂之家”。

有一回，一個孩子偷偷溜出去玩耍。周祥薇急瘋了，趕緊跑出去尋找。七都島被濤濤海水包圍，周祥薇不敢想象，如有意外，她該如何向孩子的爺爺奶奶交待。還好，那次孩子找回來了。

比起個別孩子的調(diào)皮，更讓周祥薇感到壓力的是，自己的身體逐年衰老，還能扛起“快樂之家”多久？

“我要一直做到做不動為止。孩子們?nèi)狈Ω改戈P愛我是看在眼里的，無論遇到怎樣的困難，我都會像做事業(yè)那樣堅持下去。”周祥薇的眼睛里露出堅毅的神情。

近年來，周祥薇開始習慣性帶著自己的孫輩，一起給七都島的留守兒童送衣送物，在自己的孫輩的心里，從小種下愛心種子。

不少從“快樂之家”成長起來的孩子，他們回到國外父母身邊后，依然對“快樂之家”念念不忘。他們不斷通過微信、書信、賀卡等，表達自己的感激之情。

“我還記得‘快樂之家同學們聚在一起多么快樂！您對我們這些父母在國外、缺少父母關愛的孩子照顧有加……如今我到了美國，還惦記您的好。”在給周祥薇的來信中，曾經(jīng)的留守兒童張仙仙這樣寫道。

讓周祥薇欣喜的是，越來越多從“快樂之家”里走出的孩子，動員家里人，把玩具送到“快樂之家”其他小朋友手里。

“這些孩子的愛心，將會成為‘快樂之家延續(xù)下去的最大力量。”周祥薇說。

Qidu Island in Wenzhou is special in many ways. The 12.7-square-kilometer island is only several hundred years old， it is in the Ou River， and it is about 13 kilometers from the city proper of Wenzhou. The island now has a registered population of 9，200， but more than 15，200 islanders have moved overseas. Over two hundred kindergarteners and primary school pupils are children of islanders who are now in foreign countries. In fact， these kids are born foreigners. They are at home of their parents largely because their parents have no time for them. Some stay on the island until they need to go to school or some finish primary school and go abroad for secondary education.

The river island is by no means a paradise on earth. Floods and typhoons hit it every year. Islanders are in the tradition of going away to make a living. In early decades of the 20th century， many islanders got employed on foreign ships that docked at Wenzhou. Their relatives and friends soon followed suit. The islanders who went overseas before 1949 are now referred to as the first generation of migrants. The second generation refers to those who went overseas in the years between 1949 to late 1970s. The third generation refers to those who went overseas since the country embarked upon the reform and opening to the outside world. Local resident registration records indicate that the population of the island has been decreasing since 1994. If one chose to stay at home and refused to go abroad to make a living， one would become a local joke. More than 90 percent of the families on the island have direct relatives who are working and living abroad.

Children come and go， but averagely there are about 200 children left behind， all under the care of their grandparents. During weekends and spring and summer breaks， they spend a lot of time watching television. Some children tend to show some problems in their personalities due to the lack of proper family attention and care.

Zhou Xiangwei first noticed the problems about ten years ago. She knew she needed to do something about these children sent back home by their parents. She wanted to build a home for these kids.

At first， her idea drew some suspicion and misgivings， but she went ahead with her plan. She first convinced the village management to find a space for the children. She and her son-in-law donated 400，000 yuan. Many other people donated too. Eventually she raised 1.35 million yuan and had a three-story house with a playground built.

The childrens home works at weekends and provides a lot of fun for the kids. Here they learn how to barbecue； they take organized tours and visit vineyards and see lotus flowers， they learn how not to waste food， they attend the imitation court to see how law works， they see local artisans working sculptures and embroidery. With her arrangements， students of Wenzhou University visit the childrens home on weekends and summer and spring vacations， holding special classes and special activities.

Shortly after the home opened， Zhou discovered a problem that tortured all the children： they didnt fully understand why they were sent home and they decided their parents didnt care for them. Zhou herself had worked overseas and understood how difficult it was for people to survive overseas. So she told them her own stories working and living overseas and tried hard to enable the kids under her care to understand how a life their parents may lead overseas. She also encouraged the kids to write to their parents and make phone calls.

Xu Ziwei was one of these kids with difficulty handling his daily life away from parents. He was sent home when he was less than 2 years of age. He grew up on the island. His grandparents are illiterate， unable to offer support and help in his adjustment to his school life on the island. For about two years， he never smiled. Then his grandma learned about the childrens home and sent him there. Zhou Xiangwei noticed the boy pretty soon. He was silent while all the other children made huge noises laughing and running around. Zhou hugged him and sat down with him. She asked tenderly why he was so unhappy. The boy burst into tears， his hands up to cover his face. Zhou said she loved him and all the teachers at the home loved him. She later brought him home to stay with her. Three weeks later people noticed changes in the boy. He began to smile and he was eager to come to the childrens home at weekends.

Over the past ten years， children come and go. Many have left the island and gone back to be together with their parents. Many new kids have joined the childrens home. Their parents are grateful to Zhou Xiangwei for her care. She gets calls from overseas during Spring Festival. They call to say thank you because their kids are better kids because of her. These calls make her happy. These kids， after they reunited with their parents， often call to say thank you to Zhou.

Zhou is worried about the future of the care center. After all， she is now 66.