短文改錯分步練，高考多拿三五分

蔡映桃

筆者對部分低分學生，即在全區統考中短文改錯的得分低于3分的考生，就短文改錯做題情況進行訪談，了解到這部分考生是語法基礎較差，看不出錯誤。也有人反映，原來老師要求背誦“動詞形，名詞數，還要注意形和副，連、介、代、冠常光顧，必須記牢固”，但當他們做題時，要一下子同時注意八個方面，簡直就是難如登天。

如果我們把任務拆分，每一次閱讀有選擇地注意一兩項語法考點，將問題分批處理，分步進行，不但有利于考生集中精神運用一兩項相關語法知識，也易于發現該方面的錯誤。

筆者選取本人任教的30名低分學生參與以下短文改錯五步法的實驗，要求學生在平時訓練時每次只關注一兩個考點。以2018年全國I卷的短文改錯為例，說明具體做法：

第一步：通讀全文，關注動詞與介詞。

用鉛筆劃出所有的動詞，包括謂語動詞和非謂語動詞，以及與動詞相連的介詞（如果有介詞的話，注意動介搭配是否正確）。注意時態、語態、主謂一致以及非謂語動詞與所修飾的詞之間的關系是主動、被動，還是表目的。

During my last winter holiday， I went to countryside with my father to visit my grandparents. I find a big change there. The first time I went there， they were living in a small house with dogs， ducks， and another animals. Last winter when I went here again， they had a big separate house to raise dozens of chicken. They also had a small pond which they raised fish. My grandpa said last summer they earned quite a lot by sell the fish. I felt happily that their life had improved. At the end of our trip， I told my father that I planned to return for every two years， but he agreed.

容易發現以下兩處錯誤：

（1）find與前后句的謂語動詞went時態不一致，將find改為found;

（2）介詞by后的sell是原形，應改為selling。

第二步：通讀全文，關注名詞。

用鉛筆劃出所有的名詞，包括相連的介詞和相連的修飾語（不定代詞或冠詞）。注意名詞的單復數;如果名詞后有介詞，注意名詞與介詞的搭配是否正確;如果名詞前有冠詞，注意其后的“（形容詞+）名詞”是否以元音發音開頭，以及注意該名詞是特指還是泛指;如果名詞前有不定代詞或指示代詞，注意其單復數、性別及前后邏輯所指關系等。

During my last winter holiday ， I went to countryside with my father to visit my grandparents . I find a big change there. The first time I went there， they were living in a small house with dogs ， ducks ， and another animals . Last winter when I went here again， they had a big separate house to raise dozens of chicken . They also had a small pond which they raised fish . My grandpa said last summer they earned quite a lot by sell the fish . I felt happily that their life had improved. At the end of our trip ， I told my father that I planned to return for every two years ， but he agreed.

容易發現以下四處錯誤：

（1）countryside前少冠詞，要加上the，這是習慣搭配;

（2）復數名詞animals前不可用another（另一個），根據語境和常識another應改為other（別的）;

（3）chicken 因受dozens of修飾，應改為復數chickens。

（4）因every two years這類短語前通常不用介詞，故應刪除for。

第三步：通讀全文，關注形容詞和副詞。

用鉛筆劃出所有的形容詞和副詞，注意形容詞可修飾名詞做定語，還可在句中做表語或補語;副詞修飾動詞、形容詞或全句做狀語;還要注意是否需要用比較級或者最高級。

During my last winter holiday， I went to countryside with my father to visit my grandparents. I find a big change there. The first time I went there， they were living in a small house with dogs， ducks， and another animals. Last winter when I went here again， they had a big separate house to raise dozens of chicken. They also had a small pond which they raised fish. My grandpa said last summer they earned quite a lot by sell the fish. I felt happily that their life had improved. At the end of our trip， I told my father that I planned to return for every two years， but he agreed.

容易發現以下兩種處錯：

（1）因作者去農村看望爺爺是上個寒假了，也就是早就回來了，應當是“去那里”而非“去這里”，故將I went here again中的here改為there。

（2）因文中felt是系動詞，其后應接形容詞做表語，故將happily改為happy。

第四步：通讀全文，關注連詞。

用鉛筆劃出所有的連詞，包括連接單詞、短語或句子的連詞。注意定語從句中連詞所做的成分，注意翻譯前后句子并判斷前后句之間是順連還是轉折，注意該連詞的意思是否符合邏輯。

During my last winter holiday， I went to countryside with my father to visit my grandparents. I find a big change there. The first time I went there， they were living in a small house with dogs， ducks， and another animals. Last winter when I went here again， they had a big separate house to raise dozens of chicken. They also had a small pond which they raised fish. My grandpa said last summer they earned quite a lot by sell the fish. I felt happily that their life had improved. At the end of our trip， I told my father that I planned to return for every two years， but he agreed.

容易發現以下兩處錯誤：

（1）因小池塘應是養魚的地方，即they raised fish中缺地點狀語，故改which為where，引導定語從句。當然，也可在which前加介詞in，相當于they raised fish in the pond。

（2）“我告訴父親我計劃每兩年回一次”與“他同意了”是順承關系，而非轉折關系，故改but為and。

第五步：默讀全文，關注邏輯。

通過語感和全文大意，看看是否還能找出一些邏輯不通順或不順眼的地方。2018年全國Ⅰ卷答案如下：

During my last winter holiday， I went to ∧countryside with my father to visit my grandparents. I find a big change there. The first time I went there， they were living in a small house with dogs， ducks， and another animals. Last winter when I went here again， they had a big separate house to raise dozens of chicken. They also had a small pond∧which they raised fish. My grandpa said last summer they earned quite a lot by sell the fish. I felt happily that their life had improved. At the end of our trip， I told my father that I planned to return for every two years， but he agreed.

當然，所有的方法都需要經過一定的訓練時間和一定的量才顯成效。所以參加訓練實驗的考生每天一篇，僅經過30天的訓練之后，在11月的期中考試中，所有參加五步法訓練的考生都提高了1～3分，他們自己也說，五步法效果好。

當學生在短文改錯中實施有意注意（選擇性注意）訓練一段時間，對五步法的操作自然進入了熟練和系統化，之后，他們遇到短文改錯的時候就會自動轉換成有意注意，也就是說，他們以后每次看到短文改錯就自然而然地往各類型考點方向去考慮，屆時就無需再分五步或者閱讀五次了。這種訓練在一定程度上有助于鞏固學生的語法基礎，并有助于減少其書面表達的語法錯誤，提高他們在英語寫作上的糾錯能力，繼而也會在一定程度上促進他們的英語寫作。

注：該論文為廣州市教育科學“十二五”規劃2015年度立項課題（“背誦輸入前提下運用paraphrase促進高中生英語寫作的行動研究”，編號：1201542919）的論文成果之一。

責任編輯 蔣小青