一個認真追逐夢想的女孩

廣東 陳麗芳

詹娜很喜歡畫漫畫，但是她父母并不支持她，后來受到布里德韋爾老師的鼓舞，詹娜把自己對漫畫的熱愛告訴了父母，父母能理解詹娜內心的想法并支持她嗎？

題材體裁人物記敘文315★★★文章詞數難度建議用時5分鐘

Jenna looked at the calendar and sighed. Even though she looked forward to the new term, she would miss spending her summer vacation drawing. It was so satisfying to see how her drawings could bring life to her storytelling!

Unfortunately, Jenna's parents didn't understand how much she wanted to be a comic illustrator (插畫家). When she talked about her dream job with her parents, she expected them to support her. Instead, they explained that drawing comics was a hobby, not a career.

Jenna couldn't stop thinking about that unpleasant conversation, so she turned to her elder brother, James. She wanted her brother to help her make their parents believe that drawing comics is an art form and that it can even be a great career.

But as she spoke, the look on her brother's face told her that he agreed with their parents. Jenna politely listened to her brother and then she walked back to her room quietly, feeling frustrated and disappointed. She didn't know the reasons why all her family members were against her.

At school a few weeks later, Jenna's class teacher, Miss Bridwell, noticed that Jenna wasn't herself. Miss Bridwell determined to have a face-to-face talk with Jenna. Jenna was asked to come to her office. At first, Jenna was unwilling to tell others her worries because she was afraid of being rejected again. But it hit Jenna that Miss Bridwell was so kind and considerate and maybe she could understand her. What's more, Miss Bridwell,who was in charge of the school's Literature Club, was also a famous writer in her school.She was highly respected by all the students and her readers. With these thoughts in mind, Jenna went to the office and told Miss Bridwell that she was upset because her parents didn't back her choice of becoming a comic illustrator.

Language Study

Useful sentence patterns

1. Jenna politely listened to her brother and then she walked back to her room quietly, feeling frustrated and disappointed.

分析：feeling frustrated and disappointed為現在分詞作伴隨狀語，與邏輯主語為主動關系，描述主語的狀態和心情。

2. With these thoughts in mind, Jenna went to the office and told Miss Bridwell that she was upset because her parents didn't back her choice of becoming a comic illustrator.

分析：“with+名詞”的復合結構放在句子開頭作伴隨狀語。

Reading Check

閱讀上面的文章，根據所給情節進行續寫，使之構成一個完整的故事。注意：

1. 所續寫短文的詞數應為150左右；

2. 續寫部分分為兩段，每段的開頭語已為你寫好。

Paragraph 1:

Pointing to the bookshelf in the front of the room, Miss Bridwell began to tell her story.

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Paragraph 2:

It's beyond argument that Miss Bridwell's story encouraged Jenna a lot.

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寫作導引

一、語篇研讀

讀后續寫要求續寫的部分在情節和邏輯方面與原文高度契合。為此，我們必須在掌握原文大意和敘述意圖的基礎上，分析所給文章的情境模式。

分析記敘文的情境模式，就需要關注5個W，即who、what、when、where以及why。 我們在閱讀時要把握故事的情節線，分析故事的起因、開始和發展，并歸納出故事的主要矛盾。 根據文章中已知的信息，如情感線索、行為線索、時間線索、空間線索等來推斷將要發生的事情，合理構思續寫部分的情節。

要素續寫情境構思理由Who Jenna, Miss Bridwell What原文情境Jenna, Jenna's parents, James,Miss Bridwell Jenna was crazy about drawing and hoped it could not only be a hobby but also a career. Unfortunately, both Jenna's parents and elder brother didn't support her,which made her upset. Then, she was asked to come to Miss Bridwell's office.Miss Bridwell told Jenna that when she was at her age, she had the same trouble. However, it was finally solved by heart-to-heart communication.Inspired by Miss Bridwell, Jenna determined to have a direct talk with her parents.WhenAt the end of summer vacation and at the beginning of the school At the beginning of the school Heart-to-heart communication can narrow the gap between people, clear up misunderstanding and strengthen the love between each other.WhereAt home and school At home and school Why Miss Bridwell was highly respected and very concerned about Jenna.Good communication can make a difference.

二、情節構思

基于原文和續寫段落首句提供的信息，采用圍繞中心提問的方法，構思要續寫的故事情節，這個過程一般分為四步。

第一步，根據已給出的文本判斷文章的立意。

文章給出的部分主要記敘的是詹娜很喜歡畫漫畫，但是她父母并不支持她，后來受到布里德韋爾老師的鼓勵，她決定再跟父母好好談一談，由此可推斷出本文的立意是“溝通和理解”。

第二步，根據續寫第二段所給出的段首句倒推續寫第一段應包括什么內容。

根據續寫第一段的段首句“布里德韋爾老師指著房間前面的書架，開始講述她的故事”可知，續寫第一段要寫布里德韋爾老師的故事，她又有怎樣的故事呢？ 從前文來看，她是學校出了名的撰稿人，她很可能也有過與詹娜類似的經歷，這樣才能確保續寫的兩段是相銜接的。

第三步，圍繞續寫第一段所給出的段首句以及上面的分析進行提問構思：

（1）What would be Miss Bridwell's story? Did she have the same experience as Jenna's?

（2）What did Miss Bridwell do to solve her problem?

（3）How did Jenna feel after hearing Miss Bridwell's story?

第四步，圍繞續寫第二段所給出的段首句進行提問構思：

（1）How did Miss Bridwell's story influence Jenna?

（2）What would Jenna do next? Was she going to talk with her parents again?

（3）What's the result?

三、潤色成篇

在續寫的過程中要注意情節連貫， 各部分內容相銜接：1. 續寫的兩段與所給短文的銜接；2. 每段的續寫與續寫段段首句之間的銜接；3. 續寫的兩段之間的銜接。同時要注意語言風格的一致和語法、句型以及所用詞的準確性。比如，刻畫人物形象時運用恰當的形容詞使其栩栩如生；描寫人物心理活動時使用一些動詞或副詞使其細微深入。