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試探《英譯中國現(xiàn)代散文選》中的英語搭配錯誤

2016-07-09 21:28:11顧祖良
外國語文研究 2016年2期

摘 要:一般來說,中譯英時,詞匯和語法方面的錯誤容易避免。但搭配方面的錯誤,一不留神就會出現(xiàn)在譯文中。本文指出《英譯中國現(xiàn)代散文選》系列譯文中的英語搭配錯誤,通過大量實例分析造成錯誤的原因,并糾正錯誤的譯文。

關(guān)鍵詞:中國現(xiàn)代散文;英語翻譯;搭配;錯誤;糾正

中圖分類號:H315.9 文獻(xiàn)標(biāo)識碼:A 文章編號:1003-6822(2016)02-0077-07

1. 引言

在談到英語搭配的重要性時,王文昌教授(1988)在其《英語搭配大詞典》前言中,明確指出:搭配(collocation)可以粗分為封閉型(closed)和開放型(open)兩大類。封閉型搭配是在長期的使用過程當(dāng)中逐漸形成的固定詞組,開放型搭配是在千變?nèi)f化的語言環(huán)境(linguistic context)中按照一定語法結(jié)構(gòu)和語意聯(lián)系造就的靈活詞語組合,可以無限生成。掌握符合習(xí)慣的英語詞匯搭配有助于非英語民族的人克服由于受到本民族語言和文化的影響而產(chǎn)生的錯誤,避免不合習(xí)慣的類推,從而提高運用地道英語(idiomatic English)進(jìn)行交際的能力。然而,在《英譯中國現(xiàn)代散文選1》(張培基,2007a)、《英譯中國現(xiàn)代散文選2》(張培基,2007b)、《英譯中國現(xiàn)代散文選3》(張培基,2007c)和《英譯中國現(xiàn)代散文選4》(張培基,2012)中,有些譯文存在著英語搭配方面的錯誤,使譯文顯得不夠地道。本文舉出一些這樣的實例,分析其錯誤的原因,并給出符合英語表達(dá)習(xí)慣的譯文,供讀者參考,也同原譯者商榷。

2. 《英譯中國現(xiàn)代散文選》中的搭配錯誤

2.1 a cave to hide的搭配錯誤

原文:他跑來跑去地尋。他想尋一個窟穴,躲了身子。

譯文:He dashed here and there in search of a cave to hide.(張培基,2007a: 8)

以上原譯文有誤。按照英語的語法規(guī)則,動詞不定式作定語修飾名詞,如果動詞是不及物動詞,當(dāng)其前被修飾的名詞是place、way、time或day時,介詞可以省略(趙振才,2005: 669)。但在其他名詞后,相應(yīng)的介詞不能省略。例如:

(1)The boy needs a friend to play with. 這個男孩需要一個朋友跟他一起玩。(章振邦,1999: 187)

(2)There is nothing to talk about. 沒什么可談?wù)摰摹#↖bid.)

(3)I need a pen to write with. 我需要一支鋼筆寫字。(蔡光天,1999: 242)

(4)The nurse has four patients to look after.這護士有四個病人要照看。(Ibid.)

因此,原譯文宜改為: He dashed here and there in search of a cave to hide in.

2.2 towards the evening 的搭配錯誤

原文:走在路上,還沒“斷黑”已經(jīng)一連串亮了街燈。

譯文:When you go out for a walk towards the evening, youll see street lamps lit up one after another though it is not yet quite dark. (張培基,2007b: 25)

原文:傍晚坐在窗下看書,page上“漸漸”地黑起來。

譯文:When you sit by the window reading a book towards the evening, youll find the words on each page “gradually” becoming blurred. (張培基,2007b: 151)

以上原譯文中的 towards the evening, 不符合英語的表達(dá)習(xí)慣。towards evening 是固定搭配,作“近黃昏時”解。towards 或toward 還可跟morning, noon, midday, dusk, sundown 及nighttime等名詞連用,這些名詞前均不加冠詞the(顧祖良,2013: 224)。例如:

(1) The river overflowed the banks towards evening the next day. 在次日傍晚,河水決堤了。(費致德,1981: 481)

(2)There was a storm towards evening. 快到黃昏時,來了場暴風(fēng)雨。(趙振才,2005: 1216)

(3)Towards morning the snow turned to rain. 臨近拂曉,雪停了,開始下起雨來。(Crowther et al., 2003: 507)

(4)It is now towards noon. 現(xiàn)在臨近中午了。(王文昌,1988: 1137)

(5)Towards midday, the fog began to disperse, and the sun broke through. 近中午時,霧開始散去,太陽穿云而出。(張道真,1987: 4899)

(6)Towards dusk they chanced on one another out by the gate. 近黃昏時,他們在門外又碰巧相遇了。(Ibid.)

(7)The beach was golden towards sundown.太陽快落山時,海灘上一片金黃色。(陸谷孫,2007: 2004)

不過,除了可用 towards evening 和towards dusk 外,表示“近黃昏時”,還有一個短語 towards the end of the afternoon, 同樣表達(dá)此意。只不過,該短語中的兩個冠詞the, 都不能省略。如:Towards the end of the afternoon, it began to rain. 近黃昏時開始下雨了。(Summers, 2005: 1863)

因此,原譯文宜分別改為:1. When you go out for a walk towards evening, youll see street lamps lit up one after another though it is not yet quite dark. 2. When you sit by the window reading a book towards evening, youll find the words on each page“gradually”becoming blurred.

2.3 fall a victim to 的搭配錯誤

原文:日本部隊進(jìn)入杭州,在一次搶劫中,她不幸落入這些獸類的手里。

譯文:Unfortunately, she fell a victim to the bestiality of Japanese soldiers when they ransacked the city of Hangzhou. (張培基,2007b: 289)

以上原譯文中的fell a victim 用法有誤。fall victim to 是固定搭配,作“受傷;受損;被害”解,victim前不加冠詞(Hornby, 2004: 1965)。例如:

(1)Many plants have fallen victim to the sudden frost. 許多植物被突如其來的霜降凍傷了。(Hornby, 2004: 1965)

(2)Thousands of trees have fallen victim to (=suffered from) this disease. 有數(shù)千株樹木遭受這種病害。(Summers, 2005: 1942)

(3)He fell victim to polio. 他是小兒麻痹癥的受害者。(McArthur, 1997:83)

(4)She fell victim to a desire for new clothes, and soon had no money left.她買衣服成癖,很快就弄得一點錢都沒有了。(Ibid.)

(5)In the late '70s, steel mills fell victim to foreign competition and changes in the industry. 70年代末,外國競爭以及行業(yè)中的各種變化使得鋼廠深受其害。(Pearson Education Limited, 2003: 1607)

因此,原譯文宜改為:Unfortunately, she fell victim to the bestiality of Japanese soldiers when they ransacked the city of Hangzhou.

2.4 everyone of us的搭配錯誤

原文:我們當(dāng)年編《新華日報》,總共二十來人,記者、編輯都寫,搞排版的、搞資料的、還有做校對工作的,每個人都寫文章。

譯文:The former Xinhua Daily, where we used to work, had a staff of about 20. Everyone of us wrote, including not only the reporters and editors, but also the typesetters, proofreaders and reference-library people. (張培基,2007b: 303)

以上原譯文中的everyone of us用法有誤。根據(jù)英語的表達(dá)習(xí)慣,everyone絕不可以跟“of ”,而必須使用every one of的結(jié)構(gòu)(趙振才,2005: 440)。例如:

(1)Has everyone brought their exercise books? 每個人都帶來了練習(xí)本嗎? (Summers, 2005: 586)

(2)The police questioned everyone in the room. 警方盤問了房間里的每一個人。(Hornby, 2004: 585)

(3)He read every one of my scripts. 他讀了我的每份手稿。(Sinclair, 2000: 230)

(4)There are 16 students and every one of them passed. 共有16位同學(xué),每個人都通過了考試。(Summers, 2005: 586)

因此,原譯文宜改為:The former Xinhua Daily, where we used to work, had a staff of about 20. Every one of us wrote, including not only the reporters and editors, but also the typesetters, proofreaders and reference-library people.

2.5 resort to the use of force的搭配錯誤

原文:它弄得焦急了,竟有用起暴力來。

譯文:Finally, in desperation, he resorted to the use of force. (張培基,2007b:70)

以上原譯文中的resorted to the use of force有誤。resort to 是固定搭配,作“訴諸;求助于;依靠”解,其后直接跟sth. 或doing sth. (Hornby, 2004: 1478), 筆者認(rèn)為其后不可再跟the use of, 否則,就會犯redundancy(贅言)錯誤。例如:

(1)They felt obliged to resort to violence. 他們覺得有必要訴諸暴力。(Hornby, 2004:1478)

(2)When polite requests failed, Paul resorted to threats.禮貌請求無效后,保羅就進(jìn)行威脅。 (Pearson Education Limited, 2003: 1228)

(3)Many homeless teenagers resort to stealing when their money runs out. 許多無家可歸的少年錢用完后只得去行竊。 (Ibid.)

(4)In the end, we had to resort to brute force to get the door open. 最后,我們不得不訴諸武力把門打開。(Crowther et al., 2003: 332)

(5)John resorts to lying whenever hes in trouble. 每當(dāng)約翰陷入困境,他就靠說謊來應(yīng)付。(戴煒棟,2003: 1402)

因此,原譯文宜改為:Finally, in desperation, he resorted to force.

2.6 impossible of being broken的搭配錯誤

原文:所以,古人說:習(xí)之難改也甚矣。當(dāng)然,這是說難改,不是說不能改。

譯文:Thats why the ancients say,“Old habits die hard.”Nevertheless, it doesnt mean that habits are impossible of being broken.(張培基,2007c: 64)

以上原譯文中的impossible of being broken有誤。根據(jù)英語的表達(dá)習(xí)慣,impossible常用于It is impossible (for sb.) to do sth. 句型中(Pearson Education Limited, 2003: 726),也可用于Sth./Sb. be impossible to do. 的句型中(趙振才,2005: 642),在此結(jié)構(gòu)中,動詞用主動式,不用被動式。在英語中,無 be impossible of 這樣的搭配。例如:

(1)It is impossible to predict the future. 不可能預(yù)測未來。(戴煒棟,2003: 871)

(2)It is impossible (for us) to come. (我們)無法來。(Summers, 2005: 876)

(3)The twins are so alike it is impossible to tell them apart. 這對雙胞胎極其相似,不可能把他們區(qū)分開來。(Rundell, 1997: 660)

(4)Sam had screwed the lid on so tightly the jar was impossible to open. 山姆把罐蓋擰得很緊,罐子已無法打開。(Ibid.)

(5)That child is impossible to control. 那個小孩管不住。(李在銘,1995: 259)

(6)He is impossible to work with. 不可能和他共事。(趙振才,2005: 642)

因此,原譯文宜改為:Thats why the ancients say,“Old habits die hard.”Nevertheless, it doesnt mean that habits are impossible to break.也可改為:Thats why the ancients say,“Old habits die hard.” Nevertheless, it doesnt mean that it is impossible to break habits.

2.7 beyond/contrary to ones expectation的搭配錯誤

原文:誰知道事實卻出乎意料之外。

譯文:Unfortunately, the result was contrary to everybodys expectation. (張培基,2007a: 280)

原文:它的話是我完全料不到的。

譯文:That was totally beyond my expectation.(張培基,2007c: 74)

以上原譯文中的expectation用法有誤。根據(jù)英語的表達(dá)習(xí)慣,名詞expectation前, 如不跟all或ones等連用時,往往用名詞單數(shù)形式,但其前有all或ones等修飾時,則往往要用名詞復(fù)數(shù)形式expectations (Summers, 2005: 594)。 例如:

(1)We thought John would do well, but he has succeeded beyond expectation/our expectations. 我們已料到約翰會干得很出色,可是他的成就比我們預(yù)期的還高。(Summers, 2005: 594)

(2)Against all expectations, she was enjoying herself. 完全沒有想到她過得非常快活。(Hornby, 2004: 596)

(3)The building was completed on time, contrary to expectation. 與預(yù)期相反, 該樓房按時完工。 (Crowther et al., 2003: 278)

(4)Contrary to everyones expectations Michael won the competition. 與大家的預(yù)期相反,邁克爾贏了比賽。(Rundell, 1997: 447)

(5)What should you do when an employees performance is disappointing and below expectation? 當(dāng)一個員工的表現(xiàn)令人失望,低于期望,你該怎么辦? (Crowther et al., 2003: 278)

(6)The scheme has produced results way beyond expectation. 該方案產(chǎn)生的結(jié)果遠(yuǎn)遠(yuǎn)超出預(yù)期。(Ibid.)

(7)He had been successful beyond his expectations. 他根本沒想到會成功。(Ibid.)

因此,原譯文宜分別改為:1. Unfortunately, the result was contrary to everybodys expectations.

2. That was totally beyond my expectations.

2.8 be strict with sth.的搭配錯誤

原文:有些時候他的確使人怕的,因為他對工作是嚴(yán)厲的,雖說在一切生活上是馬馬虎虎,不過這些受了很兇的批評的同志卻會更愛他的。

譯文:Sometimes he is really stern and forbidding because, though lax about things in his own personal life, he is very strict with work. Those who have been harshly criticized by him will nevertheless love him all the more. (張培基,2007c: 99)

原文:如今,她不能勞動了,可是對兒子的勞動成果,也絕不放松一針一線。

譯文:Now she is too old to work, but she is very strict with my performance. (張培基,2012: 251)

以上原譯文中的 strict with用法有誤。根據(jù)英語的表達(dá)習(xí)慣,be strict with 后要跟sb., 而be strict about/in/on后則跟sth.(王文昌,1988: 1624)。例如:

(1)Mom and Dad were always very strict with us kids. 爸爸媽媽過去一直對我們很嚴(yán)格。 (Pearson Education Limited, 2003: 1442)

(2)They are very strict with their children. 他們對孩子很嚴(yán)格。(Summers, 2005: 1747)

(3)You seem too strict with your young ones. 你對自己的孩子視乎太嚴(yán)格了。(王文昌, 1988: 1624)

(4)The hospital is quite strict about visiting hours. 醫(yī)院對探視病人的時間很嚴(yán)格。(Pearson Education Limited, 2003: 1442)

(5)Shes very strict about things like homework. 她對作業(yè)之類的事要求非常嚴(yán)格。(Hornby, 2004: 1748)

(6)He is strict in [on] the observance of the rules. 他嚴(yán)格遵守規(guī)則。(王文昌,1988: 1624)

因此,原譯文宜分別改為:1. Sometimes he is really stern and forbidding because, though lax about things in his own personal life, he is very strict about/in/on work. Those who have been harshly criticized by him will nevertheless love him all the more. 2. Now she is too old to work, but she is very strict about/in/on my performance.

2.9 It is banned to do sth.的搭配錯誤

Summers, D. Longman Dictionary of English Language & Culture (English-Chinese) [Z]. Beijing: The Commercial Press, 2005.

蔡光天.當(dāng)代實用英語精華[M].上海:華東理工大學(xué)出版社,1999.

戴煒棟.新世紀(jì)英漢多功能詞典[M].上海:上海外語教育出版社,2003.

費致德.現(xiàn)代英語慣用法詞典[Z].北京:商務(wù)印書館,1981.

顧祖良.大學(xué)英語詞語慣用法問答180例[M]. 蘇州:蘇州大學(xué)出版社,2013.

李在銘.現(xiàn)代英語慣用法詞典[Z]. 北京:現(xiàn)代出版社,1995.

陸谷孫.英漢大詞典[Z].上海:上海譯文出版社,2007.

王文昌.英語搭配大詞典[Z].南京:江蘇教育出版社,1988.

張道真.現(xiàn)代英語用法詞典5 [Z].上海:上海譯文出版社,1987.

張培基.英譯中國現(xiàn)代散文選1 [M]. 上海:上海外語教育出版社,2007a.

張培基.英譯中國現(xiàn)代散文選2 [M]. 上海:上海外語教育出版社,2007b.

張培基.英譯中國現(xiàn)代散文選3 [M]. 上海:上海外語教育出版社,2007c.

張培基.英譯中國現(xiàn)代散文選4 [M]. 上海:上海外語教育出版社,2012.

章振邦.新編英語語法(教師用書) [M]. 上海:上海外語教育出版社,1999.

趙振才.英語常見問題解答大詞典 [Z].西安:世界圖書出版社西安公司,2005.

Abstract: Generally speaking, it is comparatively easier to avoid making mistakes in vocabulary and grammar when it comes to translating Chinese into English. However, collocation mistakes would most likely appear when a translator is not careful enough about the English collocations. This paper points out some collocation mistakes in the series of translated Selected Modern Chinese Essays, analyzes the causes for these mistakes through a multitude of examples and corrects the corresponding mistakes.

Key words: modern Chinese essays; English translation; collocation; mistake; correction

作者簡介:顧祖良,男,學(xué)士,常熟理工學(xué)院外國語學(xué)院副教授。主要從事英語詞匯學(xué)、語法學(xué)、寫作和漢英翻譯研究。

通訊地址:江蘇省常熟市南三環(huán)路99號常熟理工學(xué)院外國語學(xué)院,郵編215500

E-mail: gzl9080@163.com

(責(zé)任編輯:胡德香)

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