By+Nicholas+Kardaras
“Im going to kill you while you are both asleep,” the wild-eyed 13-year-old girl said as she flailed1 and kicked her father before biting his arm. This was the second time in less than a week that Heidi had flown into a violent rage because her parents had taken away her Chromebook and her access to social media. It would also be the second time that she would have to be taken to the psychiatric2 emergency room.
When her parents, John and Melanie, first called me for help, they described Heidi as a sweet, happy, loving girl whose teachers had always declared their favorite student. With a tendency to gravitate toward overachievers,3 she loved playing soccer, hiking and taking mountain bike rides with her dad—the man she bit.
John and Melanie, supportive suburban New Jersey parents with college degrees and their own tech business, were blindsided4 by Heidis social media addiction. “It all started when she came home in seventh grade with a Chromebook that the school had given her,” they told me. Ostensibly given for school purposes, the Chromebook came loaded with Google Classroom5—which also, unfortunately, included Google Chat and various Google Chat communities.
Once this educational Trojan horse6 entered their home, John and Melanie found that Heidi was more and more preoccupied with its social media chat rooms, spending hours on them every night. Because the chat rooms were part of the Chromebook platform, they were not able to disable them. Then Heidi started becoming preoccupied with raunchy YouTube videos and also began playing an addictive progression game similar to Minecraft.7
Over the course of a year John and Melanie saw their daughter transform from a sweet, innocent girl who loved spending time with her parents into a sexualized, foulmouthed and violent terror. And sadly, she became a girl in need of psychiatric treatment.
Early adolescence is a time of dramatic change for most kids, and arguably, Heidi may have been headed for trouble with or without her Chromebook. It is also true that many kids use social media responsibly and without issue8. But a growing body of evidence shows that social media and immersion in the digital world can be contributing factors in the development of an array of psychological problems—from addiction to depression—and young people may be especially vulnerable.
Social connection is not only the most essential part of being human, it is also a key ingredient in happiness and health. Thanks to social media, we are the most connected society that has ever lived: each second people in the U.S. send more than 7,500 tweets, 1,394 Instagram photographs, and two million e-mails; they also view more than 119,000 YouTube videos.endprint

Predictably, the younger you are, the more you text. According to a 2011 Pew Research Center poll, cell-phone owners between the ages of 18 and 24 send or receive an average of 109.5 messages on a normal day, whereas all adults (18 and older) exchange a daily average of 41.5 messages.
For a species hardwired9 for social connection, that should be a wonderful thing. And yet the rise of social media and technology has coincided with an apparent decline in mental health. In 2014 psychologist Jean M. Twenge of San Diego State University analyzed data from nearly seven million teenagers and adults across the U.S. and found that more people reported symptoms of depression in recent years than they did in the 1980s. Teens, in particular, are now 74 percent more likely to have trouble sleeping and twice as likely to see a professional for mental health issues. According to a 2016 fact sheet from the World Health Organization, depression is now the leading cause of disability globally, affecting 350 million people worldwide.
There are certainly many intervening factors that may be driving this global trend, but we do have preliminary research linking depression with social media usage. In a 2014 study, social psychologists found another reason why people can feel down after Facebook sessions: they feel that the time spent is not meaningful.
As social creatures, we find purpose and meaning and bolster10 our emotional states largely through the social and cultural context created by contact with others. Not getting the right kind of human contact at key developmental periods in childhood can lead to profound emotional and psychological problems.
Social media has an impact on other basic psychological needs—including our need for novelty, called neophilia.11 Human brain is biologically primed for novelty, which, in turn, has helped us to survive cataclysmic environmental change.12 Unfortunately, this hardwired thirst can be overwhelming in the information age, in which every hyperlink, tweet, text, e-mail and Instagram photograph can be an opportunity to experience something new. As with an alcoholic in a liquor store or a chocolate lover at Willy Wonkas, the multitude of opportunities for novelty can be exhaustingly hyperstimulating.13
And what about the human need to experience reward? We know that humans like activities that release the neurotransmitter dopamine in the brain—a lot.14 Evolution has given us incentives via a “dopamine tickle” to pursue certain lifesustaining activities,15 because dopamine made us feel good. But we have discovered that digital stimulation feels pretty good, too, and similarly lights up our dopamine-reward pathways.endprint
So then where does modern digital technology, which plays off these intersecting human needs for connection,16 reward and novelty, leave us? Short answer: addicted or, at the very least, potentially vulnerable to screen addiction. Many adults and kids have developed compulsive texting and social media habits precisely because such predilections quench our thirst for novelty while tickling our dopamine-reward pathways.17 And like addicts, they can go into withdrawal18 without it.
“等你們倆都睡了我要殺了你們,”說這話的時候,這個13歲的女孩憤怒地瞪著眼睛,對她爸爸拳打腳踢,之后還咬了他的胳膊。在不到一個星期的時間里,這已經是海蒂第二次因為父母沒收了她的谷歌筆記本電腦并且不讓她使用社交軟件而暴怒了。她也不得不將被第二次送進精神疾病急診室。
當海蒂的父母約翰和梅勒妮第一次來尋求我幫助的時候,他們說海蒂是一個可愛、快樂、充滿愛心的小女孩,而且也總是老師們最喜歡的學生。以前的海蒂一直朝著優等生的目標努力,她熱愛踢足球、徒步旅行以及和爸爸一起在山中騎行——而現在,海蒂卻會咬她的爸爸。
約翰和梅勒妮住在新澤西的郊區,夫婦二人都有大學文憑,并經營著自己的科技公司。他們一直都非常支持海蒂,但海蒂沉溺于社交媒體這件事卻讓他們感到措手不及。他們告訴我,“這一切都是從海蒂七年級時帶回了學校發的谷歌筆記本電腦開始的。”借著教學的名義,電腦里安裝了谷歌課堂——但很不幸的是,里面還有谷歌聊天工具和各種谷歌聊天社區。
自從這個名義上為了教學活動的“特洛伊木馬”來到他們家,約翰和梅勒妮就發現海蒂越來越沉溺于社交媒體上的聊天室中,并且每晚她都要花上好幾個小時來聊天。因為這些聊天室是谷歌筆記本運行平臺的一部分,所以約翰和梅勒妮無法禁用它們。后來,海蒂開始迷戀觀看YouTube視頻網站上的低俗視頻,還開始玩一種能夠使人上癮的類似于《我的世界》的升級類游戲。……