Worried About Your Teenager?為青春期的孩子擔憂嗎？

王海燕/譯

It can be difficult for parents to tell whether their teenagers are just “being teens” or if there is something more serious going on.

Many of the things you may notice， such as changing moods， can often be attributed to normal teenage behaviour. However， it can be helpful to know when there may be signs of a more serious problem.

If youre worried about your teenagers behaviour or general wellbeing you should consider：

· speaking to your teenager about your worries

· getting advice from a GP1

Its important to know that many parents and carers find teenage behaviour difficult to understand or challenging to cope with.

Depression in teenagers

Noticeable symptoms of depression in teenagers can include：

· continuous low mood or sadness as well as frequent tearfulness

· voicing/showing feelings of hopelessness and helplessness

· being irritable and intolerant of others

· little or no enjoyment of things that were once interesting to them

· increasing social isolation

· disturbed sleep patterns （for example， problems going to sleep and/or waking throughout the night）

Teenage eating disorders2

The most common eating disorders include anorexia， bulimia， binge eating and other specified feeding or eating disorder （OSFED）.

OSFED， when symptoms do not exactly match those of anorexia， bulimia or binge eating disorder， can be just as serious. Some children and young people may experience avoidant/restrictive food intake disorder （ARFID） 3.

Signs of eating disorders can include：

· complaining about being fat， even though they are a normal weight or are underweight

· letting people around them think they have eaten when they have not

· being secretive about their eating habits

· becoming anxious， upset or guilty when asked to eat

· vomiting， or using laxatives in order to lose weight

Teenagers who self-harm

If you suspect that your teenager is self-harming， look out for any of the following signs：

· unexplained cuts， bruises or cigarette burns， usually on their wrists， arms， thighs and chest

· keeping themselves fully covered at all times， even in hot weather

· signs of depression， such as low mood， tearfulness， a lack of interest in everything

· signs of low self-esteem， such as blaming themselves for any problems or thinking they are not good enough

· signs they have been pulling out their hair

Teenagers who take drugs

Signs that your teenager is taking drugs can include：

· losing interest in hobbies， sports or other favourite activities

· dramatic changes in behaviour

· excessive tiredness and lack of appetite

· dilated pupils， red eyes， bad skin

· stealing money from you

How can I help my teenager？

If youre worried about your teenager and they refuse to talk to you， you may need to open up other channels of communication.

Avoid persistent direct questioning as this can make them feel threatened.

Try these tips to encourage your teenager to open up if there is a problem：

· be honest and explain that youre worried that theyre going through something difficult

· point them towards websites or helplines that can give them information on depression， drugs and self-harm so they can find out the facts themselves

· do not blame yourself for any problems theyre having and try not to take it personally—this will not help the situation

· tell them youll be there for them when they do want to talk

· let them choose where to go for help， which may be a GP， a family friend or school counsellor

· help your teenager think for themselves—encourage them to think through the pros and cons of their behaviour， remind them what theyre good at and what you like about them， and help them think critically about what they see and hear

家長們可能很難分清楚，自己十幾歲的孩子僅僅是“正值青春期”，還是存在更嚴重的問題。

你也許注意到情緒波動之類的狀況，其中很多常可歸為正常的青少年行為。但是，孩子有更嚴重的問題時可能會有一些跡象，了解這些對解決問題會有幫助。

如果擔憂孩子的行為或總體身心狀況，那就應當考慮：

· 跟孩子談談你的擔憂;

· 向醫生尋求建議。

很多家長和看護人都覺得青少年的行為難以理解或不易應對——了解這一點很重要。

青少年抑郁癥

青少年抑郁癥可能有以下明顯癥狀：

· 持續情緒低落或傷心難過，且頻繁哭泣;

· 表達或表現出無望感和無助感;

· 煩躁易怒，不容忍別人;

· 對曾經感興趣的事物減少或喪失興趣;

· 越來越回避社交;

· 睡眠節律紊亂（例如入睡困難或徹夜難眠）。

青少年飲食紊亂癥

最常見的飲食紊亂癥包括厭食、貪食、暴食和其他特定的飲食紊亂癥（OSFED）。

OSFED與厭食、貪食、暴食的癥狀不完全吻合，但嚴重程度可能不相上下。有些兒童及青年或許患有回避性/限制性攝食障礙（ARFID）。

飲食紊亂癥可能有以下跡象：

· 抱怨自己胖，即使體重正常甚至偏低;

· 沒吃東西卻讓周圍人以為已吃過;

· 遮掩自己的飲食習慣;

· 讓吃東西時感到焦慮、心煩或內疚;

· 催吐或服用瀉藥以減輕體重。

青少年自殘行為

如果懷疑孩子有自殘行為，請留心以下任何一種跡象：

· 出現原因不明的傷口、淤青或煙頭燙痕，通常出現在手腕、手臂、大腿和胸部;

· 總是穿戴嚴實，天氣炎熱也不例外;

· 出現抑郁癥狀，例如情緒消沉、經常哭泣、對一切事物缺乏興趣;

· 出現妄自菲薄的情況，例如凡事自責或認為自己不夠好;

· 出現一直拔自己頭發的情況。

青少年吸毒行為

孩子吸毒可能有以下跡象：

· 對業余愛好、體育運動或其他曾經喜愛的活動失去興趣;

· 行為劇烈變化;

· 極度疲憊，無胃口;

· 瞳孔放大，兩眼發紅，皮膚變差;

· 偷父母錢。

如何幫助孩子？

如果擔憂孩子，而他們拒絕對話，那可能需要開辟其他溝通渠道。

切忌直接質問且問個不停，以免孩子感覺受威脅。

如果發現問題，可嘗試以下方法鼓勵孩子敞開心扉：

· 坦誠告訴孩子，看到他們遇到困難，作為父母感到擔憂;

· 向孩子推薦有關抑郁癥、吸毒和自殘的網站或求助熱線，便于他們自行查詢相關事實;

· 勿因孩子的任何問題而自責，不要太往心里去，這樣做于事無補;

· 告訴孩子，他們想找人談談時你會傾耳細聽;

· 讓孩子自己選擇是求助于醫生，還是求助于家庭友人或學校輔導員;

· 幫助孩子獨立思考——鼓勵他們仔細思考自己行為的利弊優劣，提醒他們自身有哪些長處、作為父母喜歡他們哪些地方，幫助他們多角度思考所見所聞。

（譯者單位：北京第二外國語學院英語學院）