《傻子出國記》（節(jié)選）

文/馬克·吐溫 譯介/趙喜梅

By Lyons and the Saone (where we saw the lady of Lyons and thought little of her comeliness), by Villa Franca, Tonnere, venerable Sens, Melun,Fontainebleau, and scores of other beautiful cities, we swept, always noting the absence of hog wallows, broken fences,cow lots, unpainted houses, and mud,and always noting, as well, the presence of cleanliness, grace, taste in adorning and beautifying, even to the disposition of a tree or the turning of a hedge, the marvel of roads in perfect repair, void of ruts and guiltless of even an inequality of surface—we bowled along, hour after hour, that brilliant summer day,and as nightfall approached we entered a wilderness of odorous flowers and shrubbery, sped through it, and then,excited, delighted, and half persuaded that we were only the sport of a beautiful dream, lo, we stood in magnificent Paris!

不論在里昂和索恩河畔（我們于此一睹里昂女士容顏，卻未覺其美）、在維拉弗蘭卡酒店、在托內(nèi)爾、在歷史悠久的桑斯古城、在默倫、在楓丹白露，還是在其他美麗的城市，環(huán)顧四周，不見坑洼路面、殘垣、牛場，也不見未漆的房舍和淤泥，入眼的是整潔、優(yōu)美，還有裝飾和點(diǎn)綴的不俗品味，就連樹的排列甚或樹籬的轉(zhuǎn)角都很考究；道路修整得十分完美，令人嘆為觀止，沒有車轍，甚至無地面不平整之虞——在那個明媚的夏日，我們連著幾個小時疾馳，夜幕降臨時，我們進(jìn)入芳香四溢的花田和灌木叢，極速穿行前進(jìn)，之后，既興奮又歡欣，不敢相信我們美夢成真了，瞧，我們站立在大巴黎了！

2What excellent order they kept about that vast depot! There was no frantic crowding and jostling, no shouting and swearing, and no swaggering intrusion of services by rowdy hackmen.These lattergentry stood outside—stood quietly by their long line of vehicles and said never a word.A kind of hackman general seemed to have the whole matter of transportation in his hands.He politely received the passengers and ushered them to the kind of conveyance they wanted, and told the driver where to deliver them.There was no “talking back,” no dissatisfaction about overcharging, no grumbling about anything.In a little while we were speeding through the streets of Paris and delightfully recognizing certain names and places with which books had long ago made us familiar.It was like meeting an old friend when we read “Rue de Rivoli” on the street corner; we knew the genuine vast palace of the Louvre as well as we knew its picture; when we passed by the Column of July we needed no one to tell us what it was or to remind us that on its site once stood the grim Bastille, that grave of human hopes and happiness, that dismal prison house within whose dungeons so many young faces put on the wrinkles of age,so many proud spirits grew humble, so many brave hearts broke.

2他們將諾大的火車站維持得如此有序！沒有亂哄哄的擁擠推搡，也沒有叫囂咒罵，更沒有粗聲大氣的車夫?yàn)閿埧洼d客而橫沖直撞。這些紳士作派的車夫站在外面——安靜地立在他們的大隊(duì)車馬旁，始終一言不發(fā)。似乎有個類似車夫總管的人掌控著整個運(yùn)送工作。他友好禮貌地迎接客人，把他們引向心儀的車馬，然后告知車夫?qū)⑺麄兯椭梁翁帯＿@兒聽不到“回嘴”，也沒有嫌怨價高的不滿或任何的牢騷。沒過多久我們便穿行在巴黎的街巷，開心地辨認(rèn)某些在書中久見、耳熟能詳?shù)拿趾偷胤健＝?jīng)過街角看到“里沃利街”字樣時，仿佛邂逅了故友；看到名不虛傳的宏偉盧浮宮，就像看到了它的圖片一般熟悉；經(jīng)過七月銅柱，不消別人告訴我們它是什么，亦無須他人提醒這里以前矗立著陰郁可怖的巴士底獄——那座人類希望與幸福之墓，在那陰森的地牢中，多少年輕的面龐隨時光流逝漸生皺紋，多少驕傲的靈魂變得卑微，多少勇敢的心破碎。

3We secured rooms at the hotel, or rather, we had three beds put into one room, so that we might be together, and then we went out to a restaurant, just after lamplighting, and ate a comfortable,satisfactory, lingering dinner.It was a pleasure to eat where everything was so tidy, the food so well cooked, the waiters so polite, and the coming and departing company so mustached, so frisky,so affable, so fearfully and wonderfully Frenchy! All the surroundings were gay and enlivening.Two hundred people sat at little tables on the sidewalk, sipping wine and coffee; the streets were thronged with light vehicles and with joyous pleasure-seekers; there was music in the air, life and action all about us, and a conflagration of gaslight everywhere!

3我們在旅館里訂好了房間，確切地講，我們將三張床放入了一間房，如此三人便可一起了。之后我們?nèi)チ孙埖辏A燈初上，慢悠悠享用了晚餐，感到愜意滿足。飯店里的一切整齊干凈，食物烹調(diào)得那么可口，侍者彬彬有禮，來往的人們則三兩成伴，留著那樣的胡子，那般快樂、那般可親，好不法式，實(shí)在是法式！周遭的一切都那么愉悅和充滿生氣。兩百人坐在街邊的小桌旁，淺啜啤酒，慢飲咖啡；街上輕便車輛和快活的尋歡人川流不息；空氣中飄蕩著音樂，周遭充滿活力與生機(jī)，煤氣燈連成萬家燈火！

4After dinner we felt like seeing such Parisian specialties as we might see without distressing exertion, and so we sauntered through the brilliant streets and looked at the dainty trifles in variety stores and jewelry shops.Occasionally, merely for the pleasure of being cruel, we put unoffending Frenchmen on the rack with questions framed in incomprehensible jargon of their native language, and while they writhed we impaled them, we peppered them, we scarified them, with their own vile verbs and participles.

4晚餐后，我們想去見識下巴黎特色，那些不用過分勞累就能見識的。就這樣，我們在燈火閃耀的大街小巷隨意溜達(dá)，到各種商店和珠寶店欣賞那些精致的小玩意兒。偶爾，僅為博一樂而搞惡作劇，我們用法語中難解的黑話編成問題提問，故意給無辜的法國人難堪，見他們出糗，我們又用他們自己那可恨的動詞和分詞將他們戳痛，火上澆油，留下陰影。

5We noticed that in the jewelry stores they had some of the articles marked“gold” and some labeled “imitation.”We wondered at this extravagance of honesty and inquired into the matter.We were informed that inasmuch as most people are not able to tell false gold from the genuine article, the government compels jewelers to have their gold work assayed and stamped officially according to its fineness and their imitation work duly labeled with the sign of its falsity.They told us the jewelers would not dare to violate this law,and that whatever a stranger bought in one of their stores might be depended upon as being strictly what it was represented to be.Verily, a wonderful land is France!

5我們注意到，珠寶店里，有些物品上面標(biāo)了“金”字樣，有些上面貼著“仿”標(biāo)簽。我們驚詫于這滿滿的誠實(shí)，還專門就此打聽了一番。我們得知，因?yàn)榇蠖鄶?shù)人不會辨別金制品的真?zhèn)危?zé)令珠寶商對金制品進(jìn)行鑒定，根據(jù)成色在其上做出正式標(biāo)記，相應(yīng)地，仿品也應(yīng)附有仿真標(biāo)牌。他們還告訴我們，珠寶商不敢違令，而且，陌生的客人無論從哪家店里購買了什么，都必須名副其實(shí)。法國真乃奇妙國度啊！

6To close our first day in Paris cheerfully and pleasantly, we now sought our grand room in the Grand Hotel du Louvre and climbed into our sumptuous bed and read and smoked—but alas!

6巴黎之行的第一日接近尾聲，我們找到自己在盧浮大酒店那氣派的房間，爬上豪華大床，準(zhǔn)備讀幾頁書，吸幾口煙，以此結(jié)束這歡快的一天——可是，唉！

真是掃興，

滿城都有煤氣燈，

偏偏我們房間里沒有。

沒有煤氣燈讀書——只有昏暗的蠟燭。真是美中不足。我們試圖安排翌日的游玩路線；我們認(rèn)真破解法文版《巴黎指南》；我們前言不搭后語地聊著，想理清當(dāng)天參觀的繁雜景點(diǎn)和一路的旅行感受，結(jié)果徒勞無功；我們只好靜靜地吸煙；大家哈欠連天，伸起懶腰——然后疲累無力地恍惚起來，我們果真在聞名遐邇的巴黎嗎，接著便昏沉沉墜入神秘浩渺的虛空中，人們稱其為睡眠。 □