張保紅
追求忠實,是譯者的責任與義務之所在,“是譯者的天職”。在林林總總的翻譯標準或原則中,忠實通常放在首位。為了更好地理解忠實,人們對忠實的內涵、維度與幅度進行了廣泛而深入的探討。關于忠實的說法通常可見到的有:絕對忠實與相對忠實;內容忠實、形式忠實與風格忠實;語義忠實、文體忠實與審美忠實;忠實于作者與忠實于讀者;等等。翻譯教學過程中如何實踐忠實,不同的人針對不同的翻譯對象、目的與用途會有不同的認知與操作方法。其中常為人們津津樂道且頗為通俗實用的方法之一是,譯文要經得起對。所謂對,即雙語對照、對比、核對。拿原文與譯文對比,原文有則譯文有,原文無則譯文無,對原文審美構成來說如此,對其審美效果來說亦然。添油加醋,隨意枝蔓不可取;偷工減料,肆意篡改、歪曲,更不能要。一般來說,除文本外因素(尤其是意識形態與詩學規范等因素)造成譯文有目的的改寫外,“對”這一做法對檢驗譯文質量高下還是頗為有效的。
然而,從檢驗翻譯質量的具身經驗出發,個人認為,譯文除了要經得起對之外,還要經得起讀。讀即朗讀,譯文讀起來應像原文一樣文從字順,朗朗上口,而不應詰詘聱牙,梗阻不暢。許地山的經典散文《落花生》開篇句“我們屋后有半畝隙地”朗讀起來輕松自如,沒有絲毫梗滯不暢感,有人將此句英譯為“Behind our house there lay half a mu of vacant land.”。對照看,英譯文的語義、語法無可挑剔,可謂形意兼備,但讀一讀這句譯文,會有讀一詞一頓挫的不暢感,究其原因應是譯句中需重讀的詞語較多,11個詞中有9個詞有重讀音,而且這些詞還不斷聯綴,魚貫而出,這樣大大延宕了譯文朗讀的順暢感。因此,是否便于朗讀,既可作為檢驗原文讀起來是否通暢的方法之一,也可作為檢驗譯文是否實現了審美忠實的方法之一。讀一讀W. 華茲華斯(W. Wordsworth)詩篇《作于威斯敏斯特橋上》(Composed Upon Westminster Bridge)中的句子“Ships, towers, domes, theatres, and temples lie (Open unto the fields, and to the sky;) ”,再讀一讀G. 奧威爾(G. Orwell)“馬拉喀什”(Marrakech)一文中的句子“Fruitsellers, potters, silversmiths, blacksmiths, butchers, leather-workers, tailors, water-carriers, beggars, porters—(whichever way you look you see nothing but Jews.) ”,以及“(Or to an Englishman? ) Camels, castles, palm trees, Foreign Legionnaires, brass trays, and bandits.”。兩位作者無論寫的詩還是作的文,即便是對外在客觀物象的逐一羅列,均體現出上口易讀的特點。之所以如此,是因為兩位作者均對詞語輕重音節或音節多寡的數量進行了調配,若用數字標示這三個例句中各詞語音節數的分布特點,則分別為:1—2—1—2—1—2;3—2—3—2—2—4—2—4—2—2;2—2—2—5—2—2。從詞語音節數的規律性演進中,不難看出作者寫詩作文時為了便于上口朗讀的匠心所在。
譯文讀起來須上口是一個方面,但上口朗讀須合情,須合乎語用習慣,這是另一個方面。后者常常易被忽視。所謂合情,即合乎表情的需要,合乎表情的強弱疾徐、褒貶曲直。讀一讀R. 弗羅斯特(R. Frost)詩作《生命的跨度》(The Span of Life)(The old dog barks backward without getting up; / I can remember when he was a pup.),會明顯感受到首行一讀一頓挫的不暢感與人到老年時行動遲緩的不便感彼此相呼應,而朗讀第二行的順暢感與人年少時行動敏捷的輕快感彼此相吻合。所謂合乎語用習慣,是要我們看看譯句的長短形式或視覺形式特征是否合乎語用習慣。
同是《落花生》一文中有這樣一句:“媽媽說:‘今晚我們可以做一個收獲節,也請你們爹爹來嘗嘗我們的新花生,如何?”這句話讀起來明白曉暢、節奏平穩、自然親切。有人將此句英譯為“Mother said, ‘How about giving a party this evening to celebrate the harvest and inviting your Daddy to have a taste of our newly-harvested peanuts?”朗讀譯文,不會覺得梗阻不暢,但會感到要一口氣讀完這個譯文問句不是那么容易,會感到這樣的問話讀起來多少有點欠自然。查一查how about的用法,可見到的例句有:① You want Jeannie to make the appointment for you? How about the end of next week? ② How about going shopping and seeing a show in London? ③ How about having a phone out here? ④ Well, I enjoyed that. How about you two? ⑤ How about a cup of coffee? 這五個例句的外在形式均呈現出短小簡潔的特征,既沒有上列譯文的句式那么長,讀起來也沒那么耗時費力。在這一意義上,似乎又可多出一個檢查譯文是否忠實得體的方式,即看句式長短變化的特點與表情達意或藝術表現的關系。
鑒于此,不妨略舉一例來看看視覺形式變化可給譯文評價帶來的啟示。
例句① but I was really crying because I couldnt bear to tell her that I had lied, that I had deceived everybody in the church, that I hadnt seen Jesus, and that now I didnt believe there was a Jesus any more, since he didnt come to help me. (L. Hughes, Salvation)
例句② He asked Bryan about Jonah and the whale, Joshua and the sun, where Cain got his wife, the date of the Flood, the significance of the Tower of Babel. Bryan affirmed his belief that the world was created in 4004 B.C. and the Flood occurred in or about 2348 B.C.; that Eve was literally made out of Adams rib; that the Tower of Babel was responsible for the diversity of languages in the world; and that a “big fish” had swallowed Jonah. (F. L. Allen, The Scopes Trial)
例句③ “Why, my dear, you must know, Mrs. Long says that Netherfield is taken by a young man of large fortune from the north of England; that he came down on Monday in a chaise and four to see the place, and was so much delighted with it, that he agreed with Mr. Morris immediately; that he is to take possession before Michaelmas, and some of his servants are to be in the house by the end of next week.”? ?(J. Austin, Pride and Prejudice)
以上三例均取自英語文學作品,共同特點是其中的“當事人”(I / Bryan / Mrs Long)談及他/她所經歷或熟知的事情時均了如指掌、滔滔不絕,而表征這一特點的是例文中that一詞的反復使用。從視覺形式上看,可發現例文有兩大特點:一是that一詞引導的從句數量基本確定在3—4個,這也成為一種頗具共性的運思方式;二是其引導從句長短變化的基本規律可分別標示為:短—長—短—長;長—短—長—短;長—較長—較長。
下面試以這種訴諸視覺的形式規律或曰視覺節奏來審視譯文的忠實得體情況。例如:
例句④ 全黨同志務必不忘初心、牢記使命,務必謙虛謹慎、艱苦奮斗,務必敢于斗爭、善于斗爭,堅定歷史自信,增強歷史主動,譜寫新時代中國特色社會主義更加絢麗的華章。
It is imperative that all of us in the Party never forget our original aspiration and founding mission, that we always stay modest, prudent, and hard-working, and that we have the courage and ability to carry on our fight. We must remain confident in our history, exhibit greater historical initiative, and write an even more magnificent chapter for socialism with Chinese characteristics in the new era.
例句⑤ 這是中國共產黨和中國人民團結奮斗贏得的歷史性勝利,是彪炳中華民族發展史冊的歷史性勝利,也是對世界具有深遠影響的歷史性勝利。
These were historic feats—feats accomplished by the Communist Party of China and the Chinese people striving in unity, feats that will be forever recorded in the Chinese nations history, and feats that will profoundly influence the world.
以上兩例選自中國共產黨第二十次全國代表大會報告,原文與譯文均是值得反復觀摩、認真學習的經典文獻。作為舉旗定向的政治宣言,引領復興的行動綱領,每每讀來,倍感內容深刻、語言雄辯有力,很是鼓舞斗志、振奮人心!這樣經典文獻的翻譯,自然經得起對、讀、看。兩例原文均含有三個并列小句或排比句,例句④中使用了三個“務必”,例句⑤中使用了三個“是”,語義上不斷拓展、逐層推進,語勢上雄健有力、滔滔滾滾,給人擲地有聲、響徹寰宇之感。例④譯文以三個that從句成功再現了原文的句式、語義、語勢及其視覺節奏。細究that從句的特點,可看到各從句形式長短彼此相當,視覺節奏亦較均衡,用字詞數(含標點符號)標示各從句則分別為:15—11—12。例句⑤的譯文中可以說也包含三個that引導的從句。可能出于視覺節奏的考慮,第一個feats小句之后省略了that字樣引導的從句。從整個譯句來看,譯者或隱或顯地運用了三個that從句,并且熟諳英漢雙語表達的差異,邏輯思維上采取先總起后分述的策略進行傳譯,使其語義表達逐層鋪展,呈輻射形狀,給人光芒四射、綿綿不絕之感。在這一意義上,其達意表情效果在深層上與原文可謂銖兩悉稱、旗鼓相當。若要從白璧中挑出“微瑕”,個人認為若能延展一下最后一個that從句的句長(見上文劃線處),使其與前兩個從句視覺形式上趨于均衡,可能更有利于“中華歷史性勝利之光”的普照。不揣學淺,試做些許微調,且“看”如下譯文:
These were historic feats—feats accomplished by the Communist Party of China and the Chinese people striving in unity, feats that will be forever recorded in the history of the Chinese nation, and feats that will exert a far-reaching influence over the entire world.
例句⑤譯文中的三個并列小句按字數多少(含標點符號)標示分別為:15—12—7,視覺上前后句顯得略微“不均衡”,給人一種言說語勢漸降(anticlimax)的聯想。若考慮到視覺均衡或改變漸降的語勢,可作如上微調(參見畫線處)。最后一個小句微調后,整個例譯文的字數可標示為:15—12—10。
為求忠實,譯文要經得起對,與原文對一對有沒有,對一對是不是,對一對好不好。為求審美忠實或忠實得體,譯文還要經得起讀、經得起看,要讀起來與原文一樣上口、合情、合乎語用習慣,要看起來與原文一樣外在形式均衡、協調、和諧。《毛詩序》云:詩者,志之所之也。在心為志,發言為詩。情動于中而形于言,言之不足故嗟嘆之,嗟嘆之不足故永歌之,永歌之不足,不知手之舞之,足之蹈之也。說的是寫詩作文訴諸眼耳口鼻舌身心的多感官體驗,可以使作品審美效果實現最大化。這種方法借用到文學翻譯中來也是適用的,只需顛倒一下前后順序即可——為求審美忠實,為求譯文審美效果的最大化,須訴諸眼耳口心的多感官、多角度協同審視與檢驗。