Part 1 Getting Somewhere

這天Jesse正在和廣州擁擠繁雜的交通零距離接觸，愛妻Joni此時卻打來個不讓人省心的電話……

Jesse： Hello？

Joni： Hey！

Jesse： What’s wrong？

Joni： Nothing’s wrong. Everything’s hunky dory.

Jesse： So why are you calling？

Joni： No reason. ①Just wanted to see how you were holding up.

Jesse： I only left the house five minutes ago.

Joni： I know， but it’s so dangerous outside. Jesse： No it’s not. ②I admit， our street is like a 1）madhouse during rush hours， but trying to talk to you on the phone and 2）dodge traffic at the same time， Frogger-style， tends to increase the danger level. I mean， I’m all for multitasking， but this is neither the time nor the place， honey.

Joni： But everyday， the minute you leave the house， I have this 3）foreboding fear that something bad is gonna happen to you.

Jesse： I swear you have the most vivid imagination. I wish you could 4）harness that power toward something more productive than trying to 5）foreshadow my apparently 6）impending 7）doom.

Joni： ③Whatever you just said went right over my head.

Jesse： ④Sorry， I’ll try to dumb it down for you.

Joni： I’m not dumb.

Jesse： I’m not saying you are. ⑤I meant that I’ll simplify it for you and lay it out in layman’s terms.

Joni： Who’s Layman？ Is he a friend of yours？

Jesse： Never mind. What’re you gonna have to eat today？

Joni： I was gonna 8）rustle up a little something from the supermarket， and make some fried rice with leftovers from last night.

Jesse： Sounds good. I’ll probably get delivery from Du Cheng at work.

Joni： So where are you now？

Jesse： I’m on the BRT. I got a seat in the back， so I won’t have to give it up for any old people or pregnant ladies.

Joni： Hehehe， you are such a bad guy.

Jesse： ⑥Well， I’m certainly no 9）saint， but it’s a dog eat dog world out here.

Joni： What do you do if someone in need does need your seat？

Jesse： In the unlikely event that someone disabled is somehow magically able to make their way to the back of the crowded bus， I pretend to be asleep， which is easy since I always wear sunglasses.

Joni： I can’t believe you！ ⑦I thought you were a stand-up guy， but I guess I married a monster.

Jesse： I wouldn’t go that far， especially since there is a price to pay for sitting in the back of the bus.

Joni： Oh？ What’s that？

Jesse： Fighting an ongoing battle against the dreaded 10）cockroaches of Dongpu street.

Joni： You’re kidding right？ I thought our old place at the Horse Garden was cockroach central. You mean that the bus has them now too？

Jesse： Yeah. I’m 11）stalking one right now as it 12）scales the window near my face.

Joni： Ewwww…

Jesse： I know. And killing them is never my first choice. I always do a 13）squirmy little dance first， trying to avoid them near my legs and feet. Then， if they’re up higher， I’ll try and blow them towards the passengers in front of me. Roach murder is always plan C or D. And since I have absolutely no desire to touch these disgusting creatures， I keep tissues in the side pocket of my 14）cargo pants， with which to 15）snuff out the little bugs’ lives. Aha！ Victory is mine！！

Joni： Alright， alright. Love you. Talk to you later， killer.

Jesse： Love you too. Later.

Smart Sentences

① Just wanted to see how you were holding up. 我只是想知道你怎么樣了。

hold up： continue to function without losing force or effectiveness； cope（支撐，繼續下去）例如：

The building is holding up well despite its age.

這棟樓雖舊，但仍完好地矗立著。

② I admit， our street is like a madhouse during rush hours， but trying to talk to you on the phone and dodge traffic at the same time， Frogger-style， tends to increase the danger level. 我承認，我們的街道在上班高峰期就像精神病院那么亂，但是一邊跟你打電話，一邊危險地過馬路，會增加危險率。

Frogger-style： crossing the street in a very dangerous way（以危險的方式過馬路）。例如：

You can’t always cross the street Frogger-style. You need to follow a red light.

你不能總是以這種危險的方式過馬路，你要看紅綠燈。

③ Whatever you just said went right over my head. 我聽不懂你剛才說的話。

over sb.’s head： a situation is too busy or difficult for sb. to handle（因太忙/難而令某人無法承受/理解）。例如：

What the speaker said about the Black Hole just went over my head.

發言者說的關于黑洞的解釋我搞不懂。

④ Sorry， I’ll try to dumb it down for you. 對不起，我只是想跟你說得簡單點。

dumb down： make things easier for people to understand（化難為易，深入淺出）。例如：

This question is too difficult for first graders， so we need to dumb it down for them.

這個問題對一年級學生來說太復雜了，我們要把它變得簡單一點。

⑤ I meant that I’ll simplify it for you and lay it out in layman’s terms. 我意思是我會把事情簡單化，用通俗的表達告訴你。

lay sth. out： explain or present sth. completely（把某事全部講清楚明白）。例如：

The plan is a bit complicated. I’ll find time to lay it out for you tomorrow.

這個方案是有點復雜，我明天找時間跟你解釋清楚。

in layman’s terms： phrased simply， without jargon（用通俗的語言）。例如：

Doctor， can you explain the operation again in layman’s terms？

大夫，你能用通俗點的話把手術再解釋一次嗎？

⑥ Well， I’m certainly no saint， but it’s a dog eat dog world out here.好吧，我絕對不是圣人，這是一個無情的世界。

a dog eat dog world： a situation in which people are willing to harm others in order to succeed（無情的世界，激烈的競爭）。例如：

If you make a mistake， you are out. This is a dog eat dog world.

如果你犯了錯，那你就會出局，這里太無情了。

⑦ I thought you were a standup guy， but I guess I married a monster. 我原以為你是一個正直的人，但是我想我嫁給了個怪人。

stand-up： sb. with integrity（正直的）。例如：

We don’t stab anyone in their backs. We are all stand-up men.

我們不會在背后害人的，我們都是正直的人。