炮制網(wǎng)絡(luò)紅人

編者按：網(wǎng)絡(luò)走紅各有妙招，或是無心插柳或是急功近利。從小胖、芙蓉姐姐、后舍男生……到最近的某老虎、某跑跑，這些躥紅網(wǎng)絡(luò)的名人難道是中國特有的現(xiàn)象嗎？外國是不是也應(yīng)該有對應(yīng)的歐版或者美版的人物呢？本文就帶你看看西方網(wǎng)絡(luò)紅人的成名之路。

The internet is a marvellous thing. More than just a collection of wires， modems， and servers， the internet is a repository of the collected knowledge of the human race. The answer to almost every conceivable question can be found lurking somewhere in the dark corners of the Web. It allows us to meet new people， find love， or blow the ever-loving crap out of them in a variety of spectacular ways thanks to the joys of online gaming. We can keep in touch with friends， buy just about anything we can imagine， and never leave the comfort of our own homes.

But for some people， this isn't enough. The internet is their gateway to five minutes of fame， their chance to make a mark on a world that would otherwise be ignorant of their existence. Through blogs， YouTube videos and in some cases sheer good (or bad， depending on your perspective) luck， these people are catapulted into the public eye and become， for one fleeting moment in time， almost famous. They are the internet celebrities， and their numbers are growing by the day.

The Rise of the Internet Phenomenon

Nearly a decade ago the still-young internet was on the cusp of achieving the massive popularity it enjoys now. Into this wonderful world of digital information stepped a Turkish teacher called Mahir Cagri， who proudly announced on his website， in exquisitely broken English， \"Welcome to My Page!!!!!!I Kiss You!!!!!\" (yes， with that many exclamation marks). He told us how he enjoys \"taking foto-camera of animals， towns， nice nude models and peoples，\" And that he could \"play many many music enstrumans\". He reported his \"tall\" at 1.84 centimeters， and repeatedly invited readers to stay with him， assuring them that \"who is want to come TURKEY， I can invitate\". \"She can stay my home，\" he said. \"I like to be friendship from other country.\" Those who visits Mahir and stay his home can expect to speak numerous languages with him， as well as participate in such sports as \"swiming， volayball， tenis and walk\".

Needless to say， this misunderstood， somewhat horny and linguistically-challenged Turk immediately became one of the most popular people online. His personal website ended up being listed in the Guinness Book of World Records as the personal homepage with most hits (an estimated 12，000，000 – a hefty number way back in the Dark Ages of the 'Net)， and by the end of 2000 Mahir Cagri had become the first real internet celebrity. He later claimed his site had been changed and modified without his consent， but this didn't stop him from being spoofed on American TV show Saturday Night Live and planning to launch a lawsuit against Borat creator Sacha Baron Cohen， who he claims stole his sayings and trademark moustache.

But despite the ludicrousness of this story， a precedent had been set， providing a basic pattern for what it takes to be a hero in the internet: Ordinary person from ordinary background does something stupid or unusual (whether it was done unintentionally or intentionally has never really mattered)， the online community gets a hold of it， and before long， everybody knows about it. Mahir Cagri may have been the first person to achieve internet stardom， but he was in no way the last.

The great thing about being an internet phenomenon is that it can happen to just about anybody. There are literally no limits to the amount of ways a determined wannabe can get their five minutes of online fame – be it through MySpace， YouTube， Flickr， mnartists.org， blogs， social networking， or just about any other online medium you care to mention. Heck， in some places all it takes is being in the right place at the right time. A simple photograph is enough to catapult the unwary into the limelight， as 21-year-old Qian Zhijun of Shanghai found out. A photograph of the chubby then-teenager， taken at a road safety awareness event， first found its way on to the internet six years ago. Within a few months， the web was awash with Photoshopped images of the cheeky， slightly-rotund youngster's face super-imposed on posters for movies such as The Lord of the Rings and Titanic， as well as works of art such as Da Vinci's Mona Lisa.

Within a few years he became one of the most recognised figures on the net， and was given the nickname \"Little Fatty\" by internet users unaware of his true identity. He was dubbed \"the face that launched a thousand clicks\" by one newspaper， and ended up being labelled as China's first internet celebrity.

Of course， this was all accidental – Qian never planned to become a world-wide figure. On the other hand there are a great many folk out there who have deliberately thrust themselves into the limelight， becoming famous (or infamous) as a result of their online misadventures.

What It Takes to Be an Internet Star

Of course， for all those thinking \"I'm gonna go grab my webcam and make myself famous\"， hold your horses a second. To be a true internet celebrity， you have to match certain criteria. If you can answer \"yes\" to more than three of the following questions， then you may well have what it takes to start down the long， winding path of the YouTube star:

1. Are you an overweight， glasses-wearing， geeky white male?

2. Can you either mime， dance， or sing cheesy pop tunes?

3. Do you have access to cute， fluffy animals or small children that you can exploit in your videos?

4. Are you capable of emotional breakdowns either after your moment of fame， or better still， during the filming of your big moment?

5. Do you have absolutely no shame whatsoever?

6. Is your blog visited by more than 50 people every day?

7. Have you got an elaborate costume with no practical application to real life， except that it mimics something from popular culture?

8. Are you actually mildly talented and have created your own original song or dance， preferably performed in an unorthodox way?

9. Are you an incredibly hot twenty-something girl who can pull off pretending to be much younger than she is?

10. Do you belong to a group or subculture that is often ridiculed or mocked in the mainstream media?

Now that you've ascertained how well-suited you are for the hard task of becoming an online megahit， what's the next step? Logically， it would be to come up with a wonderful piece of new， original material that blows everything else out of the water. However， if this sounds like way too much effort， simply follow this thought process:

Firstly， decide what genre of internet entertainment your production will be a part of. The choices here are almost endless; why not try writing a blog， or go for a mimed music video， a display of your mad martial arts skills， or the classic monologue about how messed up modern life is?

Once you've decided what path you will take to the dizzy heights of fame， you have to work on the genre tropes – those little things that make a genre what it is. If you've gone for the video route， learn to develop over-exaggerated facial expressions. Every internet star has to master at least the mighty raised eyebrow， but if you can pull off a convincing wail of anguish， distort your features into a parody of George W. Bush after a night of red-hot curry or lick your own nose then you're pretty much set for life. If you've decided to write a world-famous blog， be sure to ensure that the domain name has nothing to do with the content of your site and that you stick rigidly to your guns on all issues – people would rather read a blog that's entirely wrong but refuses to accept defeat than a mercurial collection of postings that flip-flops around issues and continually changes its opinion.

Lastly， you need your Gimmick. This is what will set you apart from the rest. All the best web celebs have their own gimmick， from Tay Zonday's awesomely deep voice to Chris Crocker's running mascara. All you need to do is find something you can do that sets you apart from the rest of the world， preferably something no-one's seen before.

So remember: Genre， Tropes， Gimmick. The GTG principle， if you will. Follow these three steps， and you'll be an internet megastar in no time. Maybe. The ways of the internet are fickle， and even tried and tested methods like the GTG principle may not work all the time. However， should you be successful， you'll find yourself lauded amongst the greatest artistes of all time， thrust into the spotlight on late-night American talk shows and being offered parts in Hollywood movies and docu-dramas.

The Bilingual Time Internet Celebrity Hall of Fame

To give you some inspiration on your quest for public exposure， we've dug out some of the best all-time internet celebrities. These men and women are masters of their art， the crème de la crème of YouTube video makers， blog megastars， and people who are just plain silly. We've given them ratings out of ten in five categories and assembled them here in one place for your easy reference. The categories are fairly easy to understand – Actual Talent， Originality and Comedy Value are self-explanatory， the Train Wreck Factor is simply how hard it is to look away from the screen while watching or reading， and the What The Hell rating is a measure of how utterly bizarre the celebrity in question is.

So here you have it: Bilingual Time's tribute to the best (and the worst) of the internet’s superstars. Look them up online…It'll be worth it.

Tay Zonday

When Tay Zonday first posted his song Chocolate Rain on YouTube in April 2007， he had no idea that just over a year later it would have received an unprecedented 25 million hits. His unique vocal characteristics， strange recording mannerisms and the nonsensical nature of Chocolate Rain's lyrics catapulted him into the spotlight， leading to appearances on half a dozen mainstream TV shows and to become the official spokesperson for soft drinks brand Dr. Pepper's new Cherry Chocolate drink.

Chocolate Rain's distinctive style and catchy tune led to it being parodied and covered hundreds of times， and by various artists including rock musician John Mayer and fellow Hall of Famer Chad Vader.

\"I'm pretty sure the Chocolate Rain attention started as a joke at 4chan.org， an image board that is credited with starting lots of popular internet phenomena\" says Zonday， discussing the songs' popularity. \"It spread to a general audience and people started uploading spoofs. I don't know what causes people to listen to my music. If I could speak it， there would be no reason to write songs.\"

Since then， Tay's reputation has grown and grown， but none of his recent releases have come anywhere close to the success that Chocolate Rain achieved. When asked in a recent interview if he considered himself a success， Zonday replied \"the blunt question is， 'Do I suck， and do people laugh at me because of it?' I don't know. How does any artist know that? Why would any artist worry about that? Would you worry about that?\"

Actual Talent: 9

Originality: 8

Comedy Value: 5

Train Wreck Factor: 7

What the Hell Rating: 5

Chris Crocker

AKA \"Leave Britney Alone\" Guy

Flamboyantly homosexual cross-dresser Chris Crocker first shot to fame when， in the wake of some fairly harsh media criticism of his idol Britney Spears， he showed up on YouTube in full make-up， underneath a bed sheet， bawling his eyes out and demanding that everyone in the world \"leave Britney ALONE!\" His outburst attracted so much attention on YouTube that he later moved from his suburban Texas town to the bright lights of Los Angeles， where rumour has it he is planning to star in a docu-drama about himself and his housemates.

Actual Talent: 2

Originality: 4

Comedy Value: 9

Train Wreck Factor: 8

What the Hell Rating: 8

The Star Wars Kid

Another example of the cruelty of the internet， the Star Wars Kid first surfaced in November 2002 when a video of 15-year-old Quebec native Ghyslain Raza was posted on the file-sharing network Kazaa. The video， which features the portly teenager in a film studio， swinging a golf-ball retriever around like a lightsaber and making accompanying sound effects， was discovered by classmates of Raza who encoded it and uploaded it on to the internet as a prank.

Within a fortnight， the file had been downloaded over two million times. Eventually， somebody added digital effects such as lightsaber flashes and actual sound effects from the movie to the original video， and the Star Wars Kid was born.

Six years later， and the Star Wars Kid and his spin-off videos have been downloaded and viewed over 900 million times.

Actual Talent: 3

Originality: 7

Comedy Value: 7

Train Wreck Factor: 8

What the Hell Rating: 6

Numa Numa

Gary Brolsma made Internet history when he sat in front of his computer in November 2004， switched on his webcam and recorded a dance to the tune of wacky pop song Dragostea Din Tei，by the Moldovan boy band O-Zone. Not only did this act of random madness launch the song into the public spotlight (where it has since been covered hundreds of times)， it also made Brolsma， the Numa Numa Kid， a household name overnight.

Since then， Brolsma has released two other projects – a remixed version known as New Numa， featuring himself and a backing band， and a new song called Crazy Loop.

Actual Talent: 6

Originality: 6

Comedy Value: 9

Train Wreck Factor: 7

What the Hell Rating: 8

LonelyGirl15

寂寞女孩15

When a 15-year-old girl named Bree， known as line as LonglyGirl15， started video-logging about her life， her friends， her parents， and her school back in July 2006， viewers were captivated. At first， the videos covered normal， everyday subject matter， as the title character dealt with typical teenage angst， but quickly morphed into a bizarre narrative that portrayed her dealings with secret occult practices within her family and included the mysterious disappearance of her parents after she refused to attend a \"secret\" ceremony prescribed by the leaders of the family's cult.

Bizarre? You betcha. Which is why， after an investigation by fans and reporters， \"Bree\" was exposed as 20-year-old New Zealand actress Jessica Rose. The whole thing had been a hoax， set up by a group of friends and the Creative Artists Agency. Since the exposure， Lonely Girl 15 has stopped blogging， and although the team behind her has gone on to bigger and better things， they can rest safe in the knowledge that they fooled a large part of the internet for a considerable length of time.

Actual Talent: 9

Originality: 7

Comedy Value: 4

Train Wreck Factor: 3

What the Hell Rating: 7

Chad Vader， Day Shift Manager

This series of eight short films， produced by Blame Society Productions， follows the story of Darth Vader's less-successful brother， Chad， as he deals with everyday life at Empire Mart. The first episode has been viewed over seven million times on YouTube. The story presents Chad's clash with customers and other employees while incorporating dialogue and concepts from Star Wars. Chad hates almost everyone who he encounters throughout the course of his work days， particularly Clint， the night-shift manager who rivals Chad for the day shift manager position.

As a result of the Chad Vader series， creators Matt Sloan and Aaron Yonda have received massive acclaim and recognition. Sloan was even selected to play the voice of Darth Vader in Star Wars-themed video games The Force Unleashed and Forces of Corruption. George Lucas himself selected them for an award at the Official Star Wars Fan Film Awards， 2007.

Actual Talent: 9

Originality: 9

Comedy Value: 8

Train Wreck Factor: 3

What the Hell Rating: 6

中文：

互聯(lián)網(wǎng)真是不可思議。絕對不是簡單地將網(wǎng)線、調(diào)制解調(diào)器和服務(wù)器串在一起，互聯(lián)網(wǎng)簡直就是人類知識的寶庫。所有能想到的問題幾乎都能在網(wǎng)上找到答案，只不過它可能棲身于網(wǎng)絡(luò)的某個(gè)黑暗角落罷了。我們可以在上面認(rèn)識新朋友、找對象，在網(wǎng)絡(luò)游戲里你也可以千方百計(jì)地拿揍人、殺人找樂。我們也能用網(wǎng)絡(luò)和朋友聯(lián)系，足不出戶就能買到任何能想到的東西。

然而對一些人而言，這還不夠。互聯(lián)網(wǎng)是他們短暫出名的途徑，是他們揚(yáng)名世界的機(jī)會(huì)，否則他們便會(huì)覺得世界忽視了他們的存在。通過博客、YouTube視頻再加上好運(yùn)氣（在你看來也許是壞運(yùn)氣，仁者見仁），他們被推到了公眾面前，在那么一小段時(shí)間內(nèi)，近乎成名。他們就是網(wǎng)絡(luò)紅人，而且數(shù)量正在與日俱增。

越來越多的網(wǎng)絡(luò)現(xiàn)象

差不多在十年以前，年紀(jì)尚輕的互聯(lián)網(wǎng)方興未艾。一名叫馬哈爾#8226;卡格里的土耳其教師涉足了這個(gè)精彩的信息世界，他用自己那“二手”英語驕傲地在自己的網(wǎng)站上宣布“歡迎光臨我的主頁！！！！！吻你！！！！！”（是的，他的確用了這么多感嘆號）。他說他是如何享受給動(dòng)物、鄉(xiāng)鎮(zhèn)、漂亮的人體模特和人們“taking foto-camera”（拍照，應(yīng)寫為taking photos）。