美國老人的中國心

牧琳愛:出生于中國北戴河的美國人。上世紀30年代，隨父母在山東度過了一段難忘的童年后返回美國。60多年之后，重返中國并定居山東，因公益方面的貢獻第一個獲得“中國綠卡”，至今仍在山東生活。

我的英文名字叫EuniceMoeBrock，翻譯成中文是牧琳愛。1917年，我在中國河北北戴河出生。我的父母是從美國來中國傳教的傳教士，所以我從出生后一直隨父母在中國生活，后來隨父母的工作輾轉來到山東。

我的爸爸是個“中國通”。從我很小的時候起，他就給我灌輸很多中國的價值觀念。在那里，我度過了難忘的童年。那是一段單純美好的歲月，中國由此在我心中扎根。以至于當我離開山東、離開了中國后，我魂牽夢繞的地方仍是這里。

13歲時，我隨父母回到了美國。那時，正值中國處在動蕩不安、戰火紛飛的時候，中國老百姓的生活很苦。但作為一個小孩子，我根本沒有能力去幫他們，只能帶著這份同情離開了中國。

回國后，我像其他美國女性一樣開始了普通人的生活:入學讀書，參加工作，結婚生子#8943;#8943;這期間，我還獲得了兩個博士學位，并擔任美國一家兒童醫院的院長和當地護士學會主席。我當時在美國的生活很安逸，但是我卻忘不了和我共同生活了十多年的中國人。我一直想回去為中國人做些什么。

我對中國的感情，別人無法體會，我的丈夫也不能理解。但我心里一直有個聲音:“要回到中國”。

1999年，我從丈夫去世的悲痛中逐漸恢復過來，當時已經82歲了。如果有生之年還是不能回到中國一償夙愿，那會是我一輩子的遺憾。所以，我不顧兒女反對，賣掉了在美國的40英畝山林和別墅、花園、汽車等家產，一個人到中國尋夢。來到中國后，我還是回到故土。我選擇了一個山東的村子長期居住。

這里的居民非常善良。開始的時候他們對我不熟悉，不好意思和我說話，有的小孩一見到我還會哭。不過，現在我們已經非常熟悉了，我成了他們中間的一員。當地政府把村里位置最好的一套院落騰給我居住。

這個農家院落是我在中國的家。我在院子里開辟花園，在院墻上噴繪壁畫，在墻根堆假山#8943;#8943;不過我到現在還是不習慣旱廁，所以對它進行了改造，把一只木凳鋸成簡易的坐便器架在旱廁的蹲坑上。這個小創新使我的生活更加舒適。

我已經深深愛上了中國農村的樸實生活。我跟四鄰八舍的老太太們聊家常、趕大集辦置年貨、到村里的小學教教英語、到鎮上給中學老師培訓英語，和市里醫院的同行們交流醫術心得#8943;#8943;這些我力所能及的事情讓我的生活充滿色彩，我的精神世界很富有。

每年的圣誕節，我還會穿上大紅色的圣誕服，載上一車的禮物到村里的小學去給孩子們講故事，送給孩子們圣誕禮物。我這個“圣誕老人”的形象非常受孩子們歡迎。雖然大家并不特別了解圣誕節，但已經把圣誕節作為必過的節日。

我喜歡幫助有困難的中國人，這也是我回到中國的初衷。我給小學、醫院、村民捐款捐物，從美國引進優質果樹幫助農民致富，給村里的老人治療白內障、配眼鏡#8943;#8943;對年輕人，我更多的是鼓勵。我看到他們，仿佛看到年輕時候的自己。我很喜歡給年輕人講述自己的人生經歷。當遇到挫折或難題時，年輕的朋友們也喜歡找我傾訴。

幫助別人使我自己獲得了很大的快樂，我覺得這是我應該做的。善良的中國人授予我“慈善之星”稱號，說我是“中華慈善大使”。這些贊譽讓我愧不敢當，畢竟我是以回饋的角度來做這些事情的。我的童年同時也是我人生的開端在這里度過，可以說中國和中國人對我的幫助是從我出生就開始的。我能感受到中國人的愛心和友愛，我內心深處很感動。

2009年7月24日，我獲得了由山東省公安廳發放的“中國綠卡”，終于了卻了我永久留在中國的夙愿。我是一個美國人，但我有一顆中國心。我一直篤信佛教關于人有來生的說法。如果有來生，我想盡快投胎轉世，快點長大，然后找到我的丈夫，說服他跟我一起來中國生活。我將以我有限的生命為中國人民服務。

Eunice Moe Brock is an American born in Beidaihe， China. In the 1930s， she spent a memorable childhood in Shandong with her parents and then went back to America. After more than 60 years， she came back to China and settled in Shandong. She won the “Chinese Green Card” for her contribution to public welfare. Now， she still lives in Shandong.

My name is Eunice Moe Brock， and Chinese name is Mu Lin'ai. In 1917， I was born in Beidaihe in Hebei Province， China. My parents were Americans and they did missionary work in China. So， after I was born， I lived in China with my parents and later moved to Shandong because of their work.

My father was an expert on China. Since I was very young， he instilled in me many Chinese values. In China， I spent my memorable childhood. That was a pure and beautiful period of time. From then on， China was deeply rooted in my mind. After I left Shandong， and left China， the place that I missed most was still here.

When I was 13 years old， I went back to America with my parents. At that time， China was convulsed with wars. Life was miserable for the citizens of China. However， as a little child， I was incapable of helping them. So I had to leave China with my sympathy.

After I went back to America， like other American women， I started my normal life: studied in schools， had a job， got married and had children. During this period of time， I got two doctor’s degrees and acted as president of a children’s hospital and chairman of a local nursing college in America. I had an easy life at that time. But I always remembered the Chinese people who lived with me for over 13 years. I always wanted to come back to China and do something for the Chinese people.

Other people didn’t understand my emotion for China including my husband. But there was always a voice in my head: “I must go back to China.”

In 1999， I gradually recovered from the sorrow at the loss of my husband. I was already 82 years old that year. If I couldn’t realize my dream of coming back to China， that would be a lifelong regret. So， despite the opposition of my children， I sold my 40-acre forest， my villa， my garden， and my car， and came to China to pursue my dream by myself. Then I chose to live in a village in Shandong.

The residents in the village are very kind. At the beginning， they were not familiar with me and were shy to talk to me. A child would even look at me and then cry. However， now I am one of them. The local government gave me the courtyard with the best position.

This farmhouse is my home in China. I cultivated a garden in the yard， painted pictures on the walls， and put rockeries at the foot of the wall…Nevertheless， up to now I am still unaccustomed to the dry latrine. I sawed a wooden bench， made it as a frame for the toilet， and put it over the pit. This innovation makes my life more comfortable.

I have deeply loved the simple life in the countryside of China. I often talk with the old ladies living nearby and go to the market with them， teach English in the primary school in the village， train the teachers from the middle schools， and communicate with the doctors in the city hospital. These bring me a colorful life and rich spiritual world.

Every Christmas Day， I wear the red Christmas dress and take a carload of gifts to the children in the village. I tell them the story about Christmas Day and I am always popular with the children. Although the children know little about Christmas Day， they already take Christmas Day as their indispensable festival.