如何保持婚姻長久

摘 要：結(jié)婚對于女人來說只是步入婚姻殿堂的第一步，每個女人都需要懂得如何保持婚姻長久。本文從傳播學的角度入手，扼要分析了幾個保持婚姻長久的策略，希望對當代女性有所啟發(fā)。

關鍵詞：溝通；外在美；三策略

作者簡介：張文杰，廣西師范大學研究生

[中圖分類號]： C913.13 [文獻標識碼]：A

[文章編號]：1002-2139(2012)-16-0-01

Commitment is only the first step in a long-term relationship， but to most women， the next objective， making the commitment last for a lifetime， is even more important.I hope this paper will inspire you to take a close look at your intimate relationship before it’s too late.

In business you periodically re-evaluate your job responsibilities， discuss personal and team goals and long-term strategy. This application is essential in a marriage. You signed a contract and marriage is a serious business.

Many women get so caught up in feeling of betrayal that they don’t examine what motivates their man to stray from his commitment.

Men are visual and are attracted to youthful， healthy-looking females. Clean， bouncy， shiny hair， white teeth， smooth skin， and a body in reasonably good shape without excess lumps and bumps are turn-ons. It’s important to make the most of your assets and keep them in good working order; this adds to your confidence and sense of well-being. Toning and trimming are ego building. You feel better about things and are more enthusiastic about life.

Whenever we are in a business situation， buying or selling furniture， a TV， or even a car， there are three famous principles : Don’t confuse selling with installing; Keep it simple; Ninety percent of business is being there. These rules easily transfer to the marriage contract. Perhaps in our struggle to get your husband to commit， you followed the first rule in business: don’t confuse selling with installing. It worked! You want to get the commitment， and you didn’t want to confuse the deal with cumbersome details that might have scared him away. This is a very common mistake. Perhaps you neglected to mention that your ex-husband didn’t pay child support， and now you’re having financial difficulty. Or maybe you knew your mother would have to live with you， but you thought if you mentioned it， your fiancé wouldn’t want the arrangement. You went for the commitment and nothing else mattered；you didn’t want to confuse the issue with the facts. He may be resentful and feel duped now that you are ， in reality， dealing with the problems you concealed.

We can effortlessly overwhelm ourselves by making every situation too complicated t handle. It’s not always easy to process the changes that marriage brings， the reversals of our expectations. We are， after all， human beings with limitations. Remember the second rule：“ Keep it simple，” by breaking down the large problems into small， solvable ones. And keep talking. Remember， you married your best friend.

The third rule， 90 percent of business is being there， is possibly the most important. After the sale takes place， follow-up is essential. After all， how do you expect a close partnership to flourish if you don’t spend enough time with your spouse? Would you try to run a business by not being there? Of course not! You have to stay on top of your relationship on a daily basis and be able to handle the constant problems that arise. If you’re not there， he’ll find someone who will be. Stay an active part of his life， and know what’s going on in his daily activities. As a fun example， make an effort to participate in an activity together. Join a theater group. Learn to shoot pool. Join a choir or bowling league.

The purpose of life， after all， is to live it， to taste experience to the utmost， to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience. There are many phases we go through in a marriage. As we change and grow， and the emphasis shifts away from securing the commitment to securing our own personal satisfaction， problems often occur. It’s essential to keep the team communicating through these stages of change and growth.