王寒英
(韶關市第一中學,廣東 韶關 512023)
基于克拉申(Stephen Kashen)的語言輸入假說和斯溫納(Swain)輸出理論,閱讀與寫作可以緊密地結合在一起,以達到以讀促寫的目的。學生的寫作能力也會隨著閱讀數量加大而逐漸提高[1]。
王敏、王初明提出:以閱讀為基礎,以寫作為目的,把輸入和輸出有機結合,實現模仿和遷移,能提升學生的寫作思維[2]。實驗證明,讀英語之后續寫能夠抑制母語遷移,阻止漢語語境知識補缺,英語寫得更地道,犯錯率也更低。
語言理解和產出結合的緊密程度決定了外語學習的效率,結合程度越高,其學習效果越佳。而閱讀作為一種典型的外語輸入形式,不僅僅可以豐富外語學習者的語言知識,還是一種良好的交互手段——幫助學習者注意到與目標語的差距(notice the gap),激活學習者寫作背景知識系統。同時,寫作前的閱讀輸入為學習者提供良好的參考文本,學習者可以注意有用的語言片段(language-related episodes)繼而使用在自己的文章之中[3]。
《普通高中英語課程標準》明確提出:“鼓勵和指導學生開展課外學習活動,嘗試閱讀英語故事及其他英語課外讀物,確保每周的課外閱讀不少于1 500 詞,”并在閱讀能力目標中要求學生“能閱讀一般的英文原著,抓住主要情節,了解主要人物(九級)”[4]。基于教學實踐觀察和學生的身心發展特征,筆者發現英文原著,尤其是小說類、故事類的語篇深受學生歡迎并能最大程度地激發學生的閱讀主動性。高質量的語言輸入是學生語言習得和模仿的理想渠道。
自2021 年開始,高考英語全國卷采用了新的作文試題——讀后續寫。2021—2023 各地高考英語讀后續寫命題,見表1。

表1 2021—2023 年高考英語讀后續寫
從表1 不難看出,歷年高考讀后續寫的主題大都圍繞“人與自我”,尤其凸顯青少年的自我迷茫、自我學習、自我突破、自我領悟和自我成長的過程。就故事內容而言,從2020 年關注各種奇遇類的文章(如:人狼大戰、人熊邂逅)逐漸過渡到日常生活類的文章(如:社區助人、家庭之愛、師生之情)。從情節構造來看,高考讀后續寫主要是以Conflict—Solution 的解決為目標,體現學習語言的“語用”和“育人”的真正功能。
作為世界短篇小說巨匠, 歐·亨利的小說聚焦平凡的小人物,故事平淡卻充滿溫馨與愛[5]。歐·亨利的小說思想與高考讀后續寫立德樹人的理念不謀而合,非常適合作為學生的課外閱讀補充讀物。閱讀原汁原味的原著小說,不僅提供了最地道的語言素材,還能提供獨特的觀點和立意,有利于培養學生的創造性、批判性思維。
高考讀后續寫的故事情節走向與歐·亨利的很多短篇小說的故事布局類似,筆者結合“以讀促寫”的方法論,通過英文短篇小說The Gift of the Magi的課堂閱讀實踐,探討如何通過英文經典短篇小說閱讀實現知識遷移,提升學生讀后續寫水平。在課堂教學過程中,以語篇教學引領學生感知、預測、獲取、分析、概括、比較、評價、創新等思維活動,培養學生的閱讀思維,激發其進行邏輯性續寫,使英語核心素養培養落地。
歐·亨利小說的精巧體現在敘述線索的豐富和靈活轉變上。 歐·亨利擅長使用兩條或者更多的敘述線索,靈活轉變這些線索并將其巧妙安排在故事情節中。同時,歐·亨利偏愛樸實的文字,他的小說通俗易懂。這些小說特點,與高考讀后續寫命題和評價標準不謀而合。
小說的情節通常包括exposition(闡述)、rising action(情節上升)、climax(高潮)、falling action(情節下降)和resolution(結局)五部分,相當于一座情節山(story mountain)。經典短篇或者微型英文原版小說以其篇幅短小、構思巧妙、情節引人入勝、人物個性鮮明而受到人們的青睞。The Gift of the Magi的情節山,見圖1。

圖1 The Gift of the Magi 情節山
從The Gift of the Magi情節山可知,小說主要講述一對夫婦為了在圣誕節給對方一個好的圣誕禮物,而發生的一系列事情。歐·亨利在布局整個故事情節時,緊緊抓住主要矛盾——沒錢買禮物(problem - solution),明暗線交迭使故事節奏緊湊,結局出乎意料。歐·亨利在小說中,構筑了兩條線索,一明一暗。Della 賣發買表鏈是明線,Jim 賣手表買梳子是暗線。歐·亨利著重描述了Della 賣發前的焦慮、猶豫和不舍,對比Della 送表鏈給丈夫時的急切、興奮和忐忑,而對Jim 買梳子沒有特別的描述。整個故事大部分發生在主人公的破舊公寓里,也提到了Della 出門賣發的其他場所,可以體會到作者的精心布局。
學生透過賞析、探討、深度學習小說的情節構造,嘗試在自己的讀后續寫訓練中,采取類似的處理方法。以2023 年深圳市英語第一次模擬考試讀后續寫試題為例。
2023 年“深圳一?!庇⒄Z讀后續寫:
Today was Community Service Day at school.Maya’s class was going to make cards for the seniors living in a nursing home. It was also the first day Maya would be wearing her leg brace(腿支架)to school,which was designed to help her walk more steadily and smoothly.
It was a cold autumn morning,Maya looked down,feeling embarrassed. To make it lovelier,she had delicately decorated the brace with pretty butterfly patterns. Still,she was unsure about others’reaction. All morning at school,kids kept glancing at her brace. To her relief,they didn’t say anything.
In the classroom,Maya was drawing little green buds(芽)and pretty flowers when her friend Samir came over and sat by her. She felt his eyes fixed on her brace and heard him asking,“What’s that for?”Not knowing what to say,Maya pretended she didn’t hear him. After a few seconds of awkwardness,she glanced back at him,and found that he looked a little sad.
After lunch,the class set off. The nursing home was on a small hill and all of them walked there happily along the path. Maya found that the brace did make it easier for her to walk up.
Maya and Samir were paired up with a lady who was 83 years old. There at the end of the hall in a wheelchair,with a big smile on her face,sat the lady,wearing a pink coat,with red lipstick and beautiful earrings. She looked bright and full of life. Moving flexibly and fast towards Maya and Samir,she greeted first.“I’m Joan,”she said cheerfully,“Glad to meet you. ”
Maya and Samir handed her the cards they made. Joan looked at Samir’s card carefully and spoke with admiration,“You’ve written a poem!That’s so artistic!”Samir’s face reddened with shyness. Then Joan turned to Maya’s picture.“The first flowers of spring!”she cried in delight.“You really have a gift for using colour!”she said. Clearly,Joan’s praise added great power into Maya.
Para 1:In a sudden wave of bravery,Maya asked,“What’s it like being in a wheelchair?”
Para 2:Deeply impressed by Joan,Maya offered to sit beside Samir on the bus ride back home.
學生通過小說情節山的方法,分析原文情節,緊緊抓住problem-solution 這一要素,分析出原文的主要矛盾是主人公Maya 的自我認知,次要矛盾是Maya 和Samir 的友情危機,學生根據主要矛盾和次要矛盾,在續寫中提出可行的解決辦法。首先,Joan 在輪椅上的坦然讓Maya 找回自信。其次,Maya 回答Samir 腿架的作用。學生利用原文明暗線索,進行時空轉移,故事發展是一天內,從school到nursing home 再到bus 最后到home,見圖2。

圖2 2023 年“深圳一?!弊x后續寫leg brace 情節山
學生在續寫“深圳一?!弊魑臅r,運用了歐·亨利小說的problem-solution 的方法,并在敘述過程中使用了歐·亨利小說常見的明暗線、時空轉移、主題升華等技巧,使得續寫作文的情節科學、合理、有邏輯。以下是學生習作:
Para1:In a sudden wave of bravery.Maya asked,“What’s it like being in a wheelchair ?”“It helps me get around,”Joan laughed,“I can move fast and easily with it.”Then Joan drove wheelchair to walk forward and back,turned right and left flexibly.She raised her head,looked into Joan’s genuine eyes and touched her leg brace silently,feeling like a seed of confidence growing quietly in her mind. The broad smile as vibrant as sun flashing on her face drew Maya’s heart. Joans encouraging behaviours lingered in her head. which made her a complete change of attitude.
Para2:Deeply impressed by Joan,Maya offered to sit beside Samir on the right back home. While Samir just startled,Maya bravely showed her brace which was made a beautiful addition by the butterflies she drew.“I want to be as cool as Joan.”She said,“So I think that I can reply your question now.”It was the first time that Maya succeed in the fight with her embarrassment.It was a big stone that was removed from Maya’s heart.“Thank you.”She grinned. While hearing that Maya explained her brace could help her walk more steadily and smoothly,Samir listened carefully and widened his eyes.“That’s really cool.”He nodded after Maya’s words.Though the dusk sun of autumn was cold,Maya felt that the warmth of spring surrounded her.
一篇成功的續寫文章不僅要有合理的情節,還要有鮮明的主題思想,并且在續寫中能夠恰如其分地增加一些細節描寫,如心理活動描寫、動作描寫、語言描寫、環境描寫[6],見圖3。

圖3 “三點兩線一整體”續寫
筆者在訓練學生續寫過程中發現,學生可以借助很多情節處理策略來把握續寫情節,立意也不錯,但在記人敘事時,過于籠統、內容空洞蒼白、難以給讀者留下深刻的印象,更談不上打動考官,拿到高分。以2023 年深圳市英語第二次模擬考試讀后續寫試題為例。
2023 年“深圳二?!庇⒄Z讀后續寫:
Ballet was a way of life in Kelly’s family.Her elder sister Serena was now dancing at a top college.Though Kelly’s mom always wanted her to follow in her sisters footsteps and Kelly herself was good at ballet,her love for ballet had faded years before and she was eager for a new challenge. One day at school,as Kelly left the dance studio she walked past the gym,fascinated by boxers(拳擊手)training inside the boxing ring. She was deeply impressed by how hard they hit and how fast they moved. In fact shed long been attracted to boxing.
She pulled a piece of paper from her backpack.On the familiar Oakwood High School Club Sign-up Sheet was the phrase: BOXING CLUB TRYOUT(選拔).That was what Kelly really wanted to do.She knew her mom had high expectations for her when it came to ballet. Tired of trying to keep up with her sister,Kelly was ready to carve her own path.
The next day,she gathered her courage and told Serena about her new passion. At first Serena didn’t understand and thought she was just joking.But when she saw Kelly was serious.she replied,“You know Mom wants you to be a ballet dancer,right?Besides,boxing is only for boys,and you’re so good at ballet.Lean into your strength,Kelly.”
“But this is where I want to put my strength,”Kelly insisted,“and what exactly does only for boysmean,anyway?Boxing is a sport for everyone!”
Gradually,touched by her determination and passionSerena began to understand and support her. Kelly could feel it.Her sister was going to respect her decision no matter what. But that was nothing compared to the preparations for the tryout,where she was required to show her footwork and punching(擊打)abilities with other candidates.Boxing didn’t come natural to Kelly,but she had made up her mind to stick with her choice.
Para 1:Then Kelly began her training for the tryout,keeping it a secret from her mom.
Para 2:The following Monday,results of the boxing tryout were posted.
學生通過情節山的分析,得出這篇續寫的主要矛盾就是主人公Kelly 要放棄自己的芭蕾夢追求拳擊夢,次要矛盾是如何得到母親的支持。學生第一次續寫的原稿如下:
Then Kelly began her training for the tryout,keeping it secret from her mom. At the first,she was always beaten down as a fresh trainer. Tired and desperate as she was,she stood up again and again continuing her training. The Sunday fell on soon,Kelly finally came to the boxing tryout,as the only girl in the scenes. However,everyone were deeply astonished by Kelly’s performance,which was out of their image. How can this girl performed so well ? They whispered near the stage.With their admired looks,Kelly completed the tryout perfectly.
讀完學生的續文,很難想象主人公Kelly 如何從一名芭蕾舞蹈生獲得了拳擊選手的資格,具體的訓練過程、訓練時的心理變化、母親的反應在續文中都沒有得很好的體現。
王初明教授的“續論”促學語言的核心理念是“創造性模仿”,指學習者在自主創造內容過程中模仿學用語言,即“內容要創造、語言要模仿”,前后文的語言風格要保持高度一致[7]。以學生模仿借鑒The Gift of the Magi的細節描寫為例闡述。
1.動作細節描寫模仿
The Gift of the Magi通篇讀來,讀者很容易融入故事的情境中,這得益于歐·亨利用詞方面的精雕細琢,用一系列的動詞將細節活靈活現地展現在讀者眼前,如:
(1)Suddenly she whirled from the window and stood before the glass. (P8)
(2)Rapidly she pulled down her hair and let it fall to its full length.(P8)
(3)One flight up Della ran,and collected herself,panting.(P12)
(4)She was ransacking the stores for Jim’s present. (P18)
小說用whirl 這個動詞來描寫Della 體態的柔軟輕盈和心靈手巧的樣子,動詞 fall 體現Della 瀑布般飄逸的長發,panting,ransacking 兩個現在分詞表示動作的延續性同時又是動態動詞,成功地塑造出女主人公靈動活潑的特點,并且更加生動地展現出人物的內心狀態,這些詞匯都將女主人公Della 刻畫的栩栩如生[8]。
“深圳二?!薄叭瓝魤簟睂W生修改稿:
Punching,foot lifting,punching,foot lifting,she meticulously repeated these movements,as if forgetting tiredness. (出拳,抬腳,出拳,抬腳,她一絲不茍地重復著這些動作,好像忘記了疲倦。)
教師點評:短文借鑒了The Gift of the Magi的語言動詞鏈,刻畫了主人公在追求拳擊夢過程中刻苦訓練的情節,讓人物的形象更加豐滿、真實。
2.顏色詞匯的巧妙使用
The Gift of the Magi運用了非常多的顏色詞去描述主人公Della 外貌、家境情況、買禮物的糾結和解決問題的喜悅。如:
(5)She stood by the window and looked out at a gray cat walking along a gray fence in a gray backyard. (P6)
(6)So now Della’s beautiful hair fell about her rippling and shinning like a cascade of brown waters. (P10)
(7)On went her old brown jacket;on went her old brown hat.(P11)
(8)Down rippled the brown cascade.(P15)
從以上例子看,歐·亨利巧妙地使用了gray這個顏色詞,從側面刻畫了女主人公的心情、居住環境;反復出現brown 這個顏色詞,讓讀者更進一步感同身受男女主人公生活不易,引發共鳴。
“深圳二模”“拳擊夢”學生修改稿:
Whenever her mother came in,she always hurried to take out her white ballet shoes,but her eyes could not help but fall on the red boxing gloves hidden under the bed. That red scorched her heart from time to time,making her dare not look directly into her mother’s eyes.
教師點評:短文借鑒The Gift of the Magi顏色詞匯的使用,巧妙地運用了強烈的顏色詞作對比,用白色芭蕾鞋和紅色拳擊手套,表現女主人公在追求拳擊夢時的心理斗爭。比起直白告知,這種方式更有畫面感、代入感。
3.恰當的修辭手法
在The Gift of the Magi中,歐·亨利運用多種修辭手法來豐富細節,尤其是押韻、比喻等修辭手法的運用,使文章語言更具有美感,使讀者能夠對故事擁有更好的理解。尤其小說最后,作者通過一個恰當的比喻道出了生活的五味雜陳:“There was clearly nothing to do but flop down on the shabby little couch and howl. So Della did it. Which instigates the moral reflection that life is made up of sobs,sniffles,and smiles,with sniffles predominating.”(生活是由哭泣、抽泣和微笑組成的,其中以抽泣占主導地位。)
歐·亨利運用定義式比喻,將生活中的情感本質抽離出來,哭泣、抽泣和微笑三種情感也升華了文章。盡管生活窘迫,仍以自己珍貴的物件換錢給愛人買禮物,真情無價,用普通事件體現生活中普遍但深刻的道理。
“深圳二?!薄叭瓝魤簟睂W生修改稿:
Through the course of chasing the boxing dream,Kelly understood that life is made up of blood,toil,tears,and sweat,with blood predominating.
教師點評:短文借鑒了小說The Gift of the Magi的定義式比喻手法,總結了女主人公Kelly 放棄練習多年的芭蕾,勇敢地追求拳擊夢后的自我感悟:“Life is made up of blood,toil,tears,and sweat.”文章的主旨得以升華。
基于以讀促寫的方法論,通過研究英文經典短篇小說的細節處理技法,挖掘原著的隱形價值,探究讀后續寫的各種寫作方法、途徑和方式是高三備考讀后續寫的重點。
“以讀促寫”強調在讀與寫中,創設一種互動的情景和途徑,讓學生帶著明確目的進行閱讀欣賞、寫作技巧分析、處理各種現存的語言信息來實際感受和體驗讀寫的魅力。學生由被動轉為主動,把讀轉化為寫,讀寫活動變成一種雙向互動的良性過程后,寫作思維得到提升。在基于英文經典短篇小說的“以讀促寫”實踐中,師生通過精讀歐·亨利名著,找到了優化讀后續寫人物描寫的策略和技巧,如:ARE原則策略、漢堡法定情節策略、法讀矛盾策略;插敘、明暗線、時空轉移、細節描寫等技巧。學生通過讀后續寫提升了英語學習能動性,培養了閱讀英語名著的好習慣。教師應該積極創設多種英語寫作教學的活動形式,不斷探尋更多行之有效的教學方法。基于課堂實踐,筆者形成了以下思考:
英文經典短篇小說在情節構思、寫作伏筆、環境烘托、主題映射、人物刻畫、矛盾沖突、心理與動作描寫都獨具匠心,耐人尋味。學生閱讀并體驗原汁原味、不同風格的英文經典小說,切身感受英語語言的豐富性和生動性,作者設置情節的邏輯性和合理性,能夠激發閱讀和寫作的欲望[9]。教師要在課堂教學中積極引入經典短篇小說,按照“品讀—情節梳理—語言賞析—實戰運用”的步驟,進行讀后續寫教學設計,培養學生的英語學科核心素養。
閱讀英文原著小說的最終目標是幫助學生實現知識的遷移,寫作思維的提升。在這一過程中,教師應該積極行動,創設多種英語寫作教學活動,激活學生的學習動機。例如,采用小組合作探究的方式,鼓勵小組成員通過賞析名著,充分討論、探究,總結出小說細節描寫的幾種方法。課中,小組負責人積極匯報小說閱讀成果,并結合高考真題實戰演練,在活動中小組成員自主合作探究,相互學習、相互促進,實現了課堂的翻轉,促進了學生深度學習。學生最終了解了如何進行名著閱讀與續寫,而且獲得了知識、經驗、技能,提高了學習能力。
有好的文本輸入,才可能有好的文本輸出。以讀促寫,讀與寫相輔相成。學生從最初關注小說內容、人物塑造、故事構造、語言技巧,到結合高考讀后續寫實戰演練,從理解、分析到運用、評價,實現了從低階思維到高階思維的發展。通過閱讀英文經典短篇小說,大部分學生已經真正掌握了讀后續寫的寫作思路,寫作的主動性大大地提升。
英文經典短篇小說閱讀,作為學生課外閱讀范本,足以達到以讀促寫的目的。備考時,不能陷入死記硬背、生搬硬套的套路中,學生要提升、優化讀后續寫,應該是寫作思維的提升。通過研究歐·亨利經典小說The Gift of the Magi的寫作風格和語言特色,發掘該小說情節處理的精妙之處。尤其是problem - solution 的寫作手法,高度契合高考讀后續寫題型。此外,閱讀英文經典小說不只是挖掘好詞好句,更應注重啟發學生深挖語言背后的邏輯,以達到高階思維的提升。